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hi guys, hope u are all well. I had to take a break from here after getting back to work as I was obsessed and realised I had to think of myself as well, something that unbelievably I hadn't done since I joined in utter tortuous despair nearly 1 year ago next month.
I am still in the court process but have regular visits (I hate the word contact) both at my house and my sons home town. Nearly a year ago I was scared I wouldn't see my boy again. After a nightmare process, its evolved to regular overnight weekends visits, I had a really special 5 days at new year at my house and I have my boy fir a whole week starting this weekend. I still cry, the heartache of departure lingers every second of every visit but I've fought with every ounce of my being to remain in his life.
The words 'I love u daddy' be they uttered on the phone or in person bring tears to my eyes and I don't know if that will ever stop. I see many at the starting point as I was last year I'm sure like me convinced it wont improve. It will, believe and it will. Keep around your friends and family, don't be afraid to shed a tear. I did so, even today at work. A trigger point and I was sitting in the loo weeping like a baby. I hope u are all ok. Special thanks to goner for helping me through...
BD
Thanks for the update BD, it's always heartwarming to read of the success stories π Hopefully you'll be able to update us in the future with more progress still. Look after yourself - and maybe you should consider changing your username π
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