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Hello
My ex-girlfriend told me she was pregnant shortly after we split. She won't get back and already had new boyfriend. She has told me she won't let me see the baby for two months after its birth. She has demanded money for baby equip most of which she has been passed down by family and friends. She let me go to scan with her and has invited me to birth along with her current boyfriend. She regularly attacks me on phone and has filled her facebook with malicous lies. I have gone abroad to work and get away till birth and she has told me not to contact her while I am away and refuses to speak to me. Yet I have had nasty messages accusing me of not contacting her.
I want a paternity test and if the baby is mine want fathers rights.
In view of what I have said does anyone know my rights and liabilities right now?
Thank you
Thomson
Hi Thomson,
I will ask the Childrens Legal Centre to look in and give you some advice.
But from my very limited knowledge I would suggest that until the baby is born you have no legal rights or liabilities. However when the baby is born you need to make sure that you have parental responsibility - CLC will be able to explain this far more eloquently than I can π
I would suggest though if you want a good relationship with your child that it is important that you and the mother work through your differences and put some foundations in place whereby for the sake of your child you are able to communicate and work together as parents even though you are not a couple.
If you have no reason to doubt that the child is yours, and from what you have said I'm not sure if you have any reason to doubt this, I think you should consider thinking about maintenance - a really good place to go for advice is Child Maintenance Options, you can call 0800 988 0988 or visit their website http://www.cmoptions.org/ . Also I would consider talking about access arrangements asap.
I know it must be hard after a split, both of your must have resentments and anger towards each other however research shows for the sake of the child, if you can find away to put your petty adult feelings aside and work on building a relationship where you can be co operative parents the long term benefits for your child are huge.
Gooner
I think Gooners advice is about as good as it gets. π
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