Welcome to the DAD.Info forum: Important Information – open to read:
Our forum aims to provide support and guidance where it can, however we may not always have the answer. The forum is not moderated 24 hours a day, so If you – or someone you know – are being harmed or in immediate danger of being harmed, call the police on 999.
Alternatively, if you are in crisis, please call Samaritans on 116 123.
If you are worried about you or someone you know is at risk of harm, please click here: How we can help
Hi there,
Can anyone recommend strategies or books to help kids realise they need their Dad?
I have a 14 year old girl, and a 13 year old boy, both live with their Mum, and used to visit me every other weekend and half of their holidays. We have been divorced for 3 yrs.
Whether through adolescence, inconvenience, rebellion (I expect them to maintain good behaviour when they visit), resentment towards my new partner, or something more serious like parental alienation, I do not really understand why they have 'decided' to stop coming.
I text them and talk regularly on the phone, but i am really, really missing them.
I don't really want to go to court. Mediation hasn't really helped, as Mum doesn't agree that the kids should participate, and she refuses to pay, and says 'she cannot force the kids' to abide by the suggestions of the counsellor!
I would like to appeal directly to the kids... Any ideas? Please?
Thanks
I know this may not help a great deal (and others may have better ideas) but keep a dialogue going with them - they are at an age where they have other thing to do with friends etc, and I'm afraid that the parents can often come a poor second - this would be the case even if you were at home with them. At some point, they are going to get through this stage, and as long as you still have contact, then hopefully they will want to see more of you.
You could also try to arrange some activities that they might enjoy doing with you on an occasional weekend.
Welcome to the DAD.info forum.
We don’t like to set ‘rules’, but to make sure that you and the other dads are kept safe, we have some requests. When engaging with the forum, please be aware of the following:
- The forum is not moderated 24 hours per day.
- Many of the moderators do so on a voluntary basis. Whilst they may be able to provide some guidance, advice or support, they may not be able to deal with specifics.
- We are not an emergency crisis service so if you or someone else is in immediate danger, please call emergency services.
- If you are concerned about the safety of a child, please click here to find the support you can get for them (link to new page)
- If you are in crisis, please call Samaritans on 116 123. They are open 24 hours a day, 7 days per week.
We hope you find this forum a supportive environment and thank you for joining us.