[Solved] TAKING MY SON

Hi Brian

It's a tricky situation, it's not good if taking him causes him distress. The mother should be helping by encouraging him to go with you and if she is being obstructive and a tussle may result then I wouldn't advise this.

You have a couple of options, you could send her a formal letter reminding her that there is an order in place and she needs to encourage your sons contact with you rather than be obstructive. That if contact is denied because of her behaviour you will apply for enforcement of the order through the courts. Tell her that at the next scheduled contact session you will expect her to work with you to help make contact work as this is in your sons best interests and if she continues to obstruct contact and cause distress to your son you will apply to the court for an enforcement order immediately.

You could use mediation to try and sort this out, but in the case of breaching an existing order, mediation isn't compulsory and I only suggest it as a way to get things back on track without going back to court, which is a very stressful process.

You could try taking things with you to pick up that will distract him, a brightly coloured book or toy that he likes and some sweets and a drink....we bribe my grandson to get in the car with a lollipop and now it has become his little ritual as he's leaving to go home. The in car videos are a very good tool to keep little ones preoccupied but this is a more expensive option. If you have an iPad or similar tablet you could download some children's apps to encourage him....his mother does need to play her part too though.

...I've deleted the other duplicate post Brian...in case you were wondering.

Hi There,

I agree with Mojo, I wouldn't try and force him to go as this wouldn't be a nice situation for anyone involved especially your son, using bribes is a good idea, I'm not sure how old your son is but from your avatar he looks to be old enough for telephone contact, if you are able (if the ex allows it) you could call him the day before and talk to him about your plans for your time together and get him excited about what you will do, so that hopefully he is keen to come and enjoy himself.

You could ask him what he wouuld like to do with you and then do that.

GTTS

Thank you for that really. What I am hinting at here is that his mother is poisoning his mind and soon if I don't get any meaning full contact soon, the bond will be broken, and I will not be a father to him. That is the reason I alluded to making him come with me. But will persevere.

Brian