[Solved] Sports Day

i would say forget it. my ex will just be a pain in the *** if i even bring up sports day, so not bothering.

Is she telling you or asking you? If asking - perhaps say that you're unsure whether it's the appropriate venue for you to meet as you don't want to create any awkward atmosphere for your child?

Well she asked “what do you think to X coming to sports day”

I replied saying uncomfortable and I should be able to enjoy my child’s sports day... then she just went on about me having to meet him sometime, they will stand away from me etc... didn’t really listen to my reply.

So sports day is today and she’s taking him... apparently it’s what the kids would want and they come first.

Hi there

I’m sorry she wasn’t prepared to listen to your opinion. How did it go?

doesnt this all seem petty? i dont even know when my kids sports day is. it should be about the children, not an episode from hollyoaks. i can already sense that the ex has started turning the teachers against me lol, by the way they speak to me. another reason to keep a distance and just enjoy time with my kids during my weekends with them.

I’m not sure that’s fair Bill, being involved in our kids school life is important in my opinion, that includes attending sports days, parents evenings and other activities.

Hello DadForever123,

You voiced your opinion on your ex's new partner attending sports day and how it would make you feel. You say she, quote, "didn't really listen to my reply." You now know she is not considering how you feel and basically does not want to know, so be it. You know where you stand.

I personally would go to the sports day for the benefit of yourself and your children. It is your relationship with your children that is all important, no one else matters. Enjoy the day!

If by chance you meet the new partner, be polite and exchange a pleasantry with him. There is no need to linger in his company just excuse yourself and move to another position.

Hi.

I went (me not going was never an option) and was prepared to meet him. Be polite and stand away from them.

When she turned up she was on her own. So at the end of the day she did listen but at first did not like my answer.

Re Bill reply - I play a very active role in my child’s life. I do school runs, attend all after school clubs and share 50% custody. You could say I’m lucky my current job allows me to be flexible. So don’t class this as petty as a sports day is for parents and their children.

DadForever123... I’m glad the situation didn’t develop for you, it might be worth trying to discuss the situation with her, now the question has arisen.

A parenting plan might be useful for you both, to set out some guidelines and work on a plan that you are both on board with, working on an “introducing new partners” section would avoid any misunderstandings in the future.

Bill... it’s worth remembering that our children spend most of their childhood at school, their teachers spend more time with them than we do! That’s why its important to develop a good relationship with the school and to get fully involved.

When one parent stops the other parents natural interaction with their children’s education, the children suffer, emotionally and educationally, it’s part of the process of parental alienation... I’d give some thought to getting more involved with school life Bill, regardless of what the ex wants.

Glad sports day didn't end up being problematic.

Agree with Mojo - it might be good to look at a parenting plan or at least try to have a discussion with the ex about moving forward.

Bill - any judge / sw will tell you how important it is for both parents to be involved in their children's education. It's why PR exists. There are laws you can ask the school to abide by if you want to try and get involved.