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Hi all,
I’m hoping you may be able to help me come to an arrangement agreement with ex wife and see as much of my son as possible. I don’t want to be a weekend dad but also want to have the balance to have my time so I can move forward.
It’s very difficult as I work shifts one week 6-2 Monday - Friday and then 2-10 Monday Friday.
My son will be 3 in August so will be going to nursery 4 times a week.
Previously I made the most of shifts and saw him before of after work depending on shift. My ex has suggested the following which I find difficult especially on second week as I’ll miss him.
The only alternatives are to change the below and agree or to speak to manager and ask for flexi hours ? Main issue is the late shifts afternoons 2pm - 10pm.
What’s your opinion guys and gals any help suggestions appreciated I adore my son and will only be 5 mins walk from his nursery and only 15 mins walk from his mothers home, and approx 25 mins away when I’m at work. On a Monday 3 mins walk at my parents house.
Week 1 - 6 - 2 shift
Monday - spends day with grandparents this is close to my work place only 5 mins away! 730am - 6pm i will drop son off at mothers 30 min away via car.
Tuesday -nursery 0730 - 430 mother pick up and have Over night.
Wednesday - nursery 0730 - 430 dad me to pick up and take for tea and drop home at his mothers at 6ish.
Thursday - nursery 0730 - 430 mother pick up and have Over night
Friday - ursery 0730 - 430 dad me to pick up and have overnight then the weekend is spent over night with me.
Saturday - son with me day and over night
Sunday - son with me day and over night
Merging now into Monday which I start work on afternoon 2-10pm shift.
Monday 2-10
spends day with grandparents this is close to my work place only 5 mins away! So I can see before work till 2pm mother will pick up son from grandparents at 6.
Tuesday nursery 0730-430 overnight with mother
Wed - nursery 0730-430 overnight with mother
Thursday - nursery nursery 0730-430 overnight with mother
Friday - nursery 0730-430 overnight with mother
Saturday - weekend with mother day and over night
Sunday weekend with mother day and over night - ( suggestion that I could pick son up and take to grandparents and they have over night ?)
This would mean no free weekends for me.
Merge into 6-2 shift for new week and repeat.
Any advice or help is appreciated just want a good balance and new fresh start and be close to my son. My ex has a new partner and of course I’d like to meet someone and socialise time to myself?
Look forward to hearing from you
On another note I pay £180 a month to ex wife for son.
G
Hi,
shift work is a pain. i did something similarin past, but only 6am-2pm. i stayed the [censored] away from 2-10 pm and other funky shifts. if you want to see your child more then you will have to make sacrifices and make yourself more available. consider dropping shift work and get regular 9-5 work.
... On the 2 - 10 shift could you not adjust the nursery to accommodate it? So that on that week he only did afternoons, from say 12.30...that would make it possible for you to have him each morning.
As far as your “me time” that’s pretty difficult when kids are in the mix! I guess you’ll just have to grab it when you can.
All the best
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