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Hi to everyone on the forum and working behind the scenes.
I just would like to introduce myself, say hello and give you a brief incite to my personal situation.
So basically, me and my ex partner who share a 3 year old child together have been split around 10 months now. She has what I thought moved on and found a new partner who is currently co-habiting with her and i myself have found a new partner 🙂
The issue i have and would like some info on by anyone else who has been in my situation is regarding the child. At first things were ok, i would have our child on specific days and weekends and if certain days or weekends were not good we would swap to accommodate quite easiely. Over time she has become a pain in both mine and my partners life casuing us some severe stress and now i have developed anxiety related issues. Threatening behaviour, contacting me regarding issues that do not involve our child and so on.
Basically, after the last few outburst i am not willing to take the chance that she will make things harder for me to have access to our child. Going away on holidays with the child and my partner, having the child stay over at my partner’s house, just generally being around my new partner will make her kick off again and again. I have no issues and haven’t from day one with the fact she has someone new in her life who is around my child a lot more than my partner currently is. Yetshe has all the issues. i just need some advice before i go to a solicitor about what i need to do next to have some ground rules put in place.
Hi there
It's such a pity that the good coparenting relationship you started with couldn't continue, but ts quite common for this to happen when new partners become involved.
Your first option must be mediation to try and get things back on track, here's a link to their services
www.nfm.org.uk
If this fails, then the only other option is to apply to court for a Child Arrangements Order, but court should always be the last resort.
I would hold off on going to a solicitor just yet, as you can arrange mediation yourselves and it will save you money, that hopefully you can spend on your child. Even if mediation fails, its quite straightforward to make the court application without a solicito...many dads manage the whole process themselves, or use a barrister for the final hearing, hence saving thousands of pounds in fees.
Check out the stickys at the top of the legal eagle section, there's lots of information you may find helpful... any questions please don't hesitate to ask
All the best
Thank you so much. I am straight on it with filling in the forms.
I will keep everyone posted on my journey throughout all this.
Hi
Welcome and good luck with it all!
I second Mojo's advice and would also like to add that it's very easy to self rep.
You might find that the mother will agree in mediation. If she doesn't or won't go, get your application in.
It sounds like you have a relatively straight forward situation that shouldn't require a solicitor.
If you end up in court and it gets complicated - by all means take that road but don't waste thousands of pounds on what should be something simple. You will get plenty of advice on here if you need it.
Can I just ask, is mediation a legal agreement if we come to some sort of agreement regarding our child or arrangments?
Unfortunately mediation isn't legally binding, you can ask for a Memorandum of Understanding to be drawn up and whilst it's not a legal document, if she went back on it and you found yourself in court, you could use it to show what had been agreed by you both.
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