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Hi , I am new on here and just wanted to see what anyone’s thoughts are on my situation.
I have been separated from
My wife now for 16 months -her choice. We have a 9 years old son together and I am named on the birth certificate.
We now live separately having sold the family home and have no chance of reconciliation.
I have regular contact with my son and live within a mile of where he lives , goes to school and where his doctors surgery is.
My ex is keeping my contact a fraction below 50/50 in order to secure maintenance.
I have initiated the court process to obtain a parental responsibility order asking for 50/50 contact - that is I will also do half of the pastoral care and actually spend the money I would pay her directly on him buying all his uniform and clothing etc
She is apposed to this strongly quoting all sorts of rubbish that led to our marriage failing -nothing to do with my parenting skills.
What are anyone’s views on my action and possible outcomes or success?
I will be representing myself in court.
Has anyone been through this themselves ?
Any advice (please say it how it is) would be much appreciated.
Does your child have over night stays at the moment? I am hoping to get 50/50 care but I am not going to hold my breath.
Have you attempted mediation? This would be the best option first, and less expensive and time consuming. If you can, I would recommend a solicitor, I went twice without one and felt bullied, so i have one now.
The issue is, what ever she is using as the reason to not allow you to see you child more, she will say all of this to cafcass and the courts and it will most likely be investigated. Depending on her allegations, they could possibly stop all contact all together. Maybe continue with your current arrangement, wait for her to calm down and approach it again in the new year maybe?
Thankyou for your reply
Yes -he stays over 3 nights a week on average -like i say across the month she is keeping it just below 50/50 in order to get maintenance
Obviously this is making things difficult financially for me
I am attending my first MIAM meeting next week -I don’t think she will
Engage with them ?
My ex did the same. She would no agree to joint mediation, so i had no choice to go to court. At the moment, all I am getting is 2 hours every two weeks at a contact centre. I have not been alone with my children for over 9 months. I am hoping this will change soon.
I hope mediation works for you. Good luck!!
Yes, you have to attempt mediation, but it can be signed off at the first session if she won't attend, or there is obviously no agreement, and then you can proceed on to court. Of course, there is always the hope that it might actually achieve an acceptable compromise.
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