Welcome to the DAD.Info forum: Important Information – open to read:
Our forum aims to provide support and guidance where it can, however we may not always have the answer. The forum is not moderated 24 hours a day, so If you – or someone you know – are being harmed or in immediate danger of being harmed, call the police on 999.
Alternatively, if you are in crisis, please call Samaritans on 116 123.
If you are worried about you or someone you know is at risk of harm, please click here: How we can help
Hi looking for some more info my ex had a non molustation order put on me back in July for 6 months I attended the 15 minuite hearing and I felt that the judge was not interested in what I had to say there was alot off false allegations made against me at the time which I was very upsetting... since then I have had contact with my daughter for one hour a week I have not broke the order and there has been no more arguments but now as things are closely coming to an end I feel they will try to anything to try and make me slip up which is not what I will do. I have now been in contact with a barrister and plan to go to court for child access I have kept my self squeaky clean over the past 6 months and followed the order correctly my aim is just to be a good dad and provide for my daughter I've offerd to pay my way and also done shops for my daughter but all off a sudden they are now asking for cash which I refused and said I would set up a standing order so it's on my banking records I feel that they will now stop me from seeing my daughter as it's just a game to them... all I want to no is has any one been in a similar situation and will this go in my favour once I've took the right proceedings I've asked for more time with my little girl so we can get an even better bond but my ex simply wont allow it they said through text message if I'm not happy with the amount off time then not to bother at all so being very difficult although these past 6 months I havent let my daughter down once allways ask if she needs things and always offerd help I'm planning on taking this further will I gain anything from doing so I feel extremely controlled by them and every one around me is saying the same thing I just go along with it cause I'm scared off losing the only thing that matters to me the most any advise would be really appreciated cheers.
hi,
sounds like its been going well with child contact. your right in not giving any cash in hand. dont do it. have you had a look at the cms calculator website? if not, check it out. you could be paying a lot more and might be better off going through child maintenance service. you need to get out of this 1 hour a week rota as its a joke. my last hearing was in may and i said the summer holidays are coming up and i have big days planned out for the kids and i am not missing summer, and fri-sun contact has to start ASAP. cafcass talked some sense in to the ex. i dont know background to your case, and why you see just 1 hour a week. you can aim for overnights/weekends, but have a feeling they will do things gradually, like let you see your child for a few more hour per week. fight for more access.
Thanks for your reply my ex got it out as I made threats towards the guy she cheated on me with and now they are together I've been through [censored] and back and had to go through DNA procedures I've done my very best to keep my focus on my little girl and make changes in my own life the one hour a week was agreed hoping that it would soon be put up but my exs mum is doing the contact and she just loved the control she persuaded me to do it that way so she wasnt handed over to a stranger at a contact centre. So I agreed hoping that in time she would communicate with my ex in how I am with my little one but I dont think this is happening all I will say is they no how to push my buttons and use my daughter to there advantage claiming I'm this big bad person shes had me arrested once and I was never charger the judge at the hearing to do with the order said he wasnt interested in what happend before the baby had arrived was more interested now she is here so I've kept my cool and done every thing I've been asked to do and just gone along with no arguments I'm not asking for much just that I can have my daughter and take her out on days out as my family is also finding it very hard to deal with but they seem to not be botherd about other peoples feelings as they are just selfish they want me to walk away but I wont as I'm not willing to have my daughter grow up with out me. I just hope I have a good chance in court as I've been doing the right things
hi,
how old is your child?
8 months now
Welcome to the DAD.info forum.
We don’t like to set ‘rules’, but to make sure that you and the other dads are kept safe, we have some requests. When engaging with the forum, please be aware of the following:
- The forum is not moderated 24 hours per day.
- Many of the moderators do so on a voluntary basis. Whilst they may be able to provide some guidance, advice or support, they may not be able to deal with specifics.
- We are not an emergency crisis service so if you or someone else is in immediate danger, please call emergency services.
- If you are concerned about the safety of a child, please click here to find the support you can get for them (link to new page)
- If you are in crisis, please call Samaritans on 116 123. They are open 24 hours a day, 7 days per week.
We hope you find this forum a supportive environment and thank you for joining us.