[Solved] Non molustation due to end

hi,

sounds like its been going well with child contact. your right in not giving any cash in hand. dont do it. have you had a look at the cms calculator website? if not, check it out. you could be paying a lot more and might be better off going through child maintenance service. you need to get out of this 1 hour a week rota as its a joke. my last hearing was in may and i said the summer holidays are coming up and i have big days planned out for the kids and i am not missing summer, and fri-sun contact has to start ASAP. cafcass talked some sense in to the ex. i dont know background to your case, and why you see just 1 hour a week. you can aim for overnights/weekends, but have a feeling they will do things gradually, like let you see your child for a few more hour per week. fight for more access.

Thanks for your reply my ex got it out as I made threats towards the guy she cheated on me with and now they are together I've been through [censored] and back and had to go through DNA procedures I've done my very best to keep my focus on my little girl and make changes in my own life the one hour a week was agreed hoping that it would soon be put up but my exs mum is doing the contact and she just loved the control she persuaded me to do it that way so she wasnt handed over to a stranger at a contact centre. So I agreed hoping that in time she would communicate with my ex in how I am with my little one but I dont think this is happening all I will say is they no how to push my buttons and use my daughter to there advantage claiming I'm this big bad person shes had me arrested once and I was never charger the judge at the hearing to do with the order said he wasnt interested in what happend before the baby had arrived was more interested now she is here so I've kept my cool and done every thing I've been asked to do and just gone along with no arguments I'm not asking for much just that I can have my daughter and take her out on days out as my family is also finding it very hard to deal with but they seem to not be botherd about other peoples feelings as they are just selfish they want me to walk away but I wont as I'm not willing to have my daughter grow up with out me. I just hope I have a good chance in court as I've been doing the right things

hi,

how old is your child?

8 months now

Nobody can predict what an individual court will decide but in my experience, with babies and toddlers, they tend to prefer little and often. It sounds like you're in for a bit of a bumpy ride whichever direction you take but hopefully the court will get something sorted and it's good you have a barrister to help.

With regard to payments, try not pay cash if you can. Use bank transfer, standing order or paypal or anything that you can keep a record of.

... and make sure you put a reference of "child maintenance" with those payments, so there is no doubt what it's for.

8 months now

i see. one of my kids will be 1 at the end of november. up until now i have only been seeing her for an hour, every other weekend. just staying close by to the ex address (she told court she intends to breastfeed until baby is 1. obvious lie, but it is what it is.)have 2 older kids that stay with me every other weekend. once baby is a year old, the plan is for the baby to spend couple of hours at my place. then hopefully from age 2, can look at overnight stays.

Thanks for the reply luckly my daughter is bottle fed so plus I have recipts for milk ect going ahead in January so fingers crossed I get a decent out come

Your situation sounds identical to mine only have had 8 years of [censored]. It just doesn’t start and I’ve lost all faith in Social, Cafcass, courts . With my case - doesn’t matter on how much visual evidence, verbal recorded evidence, just plain open their darn eyes evidence over the past - courts are blind n turn their hearing aids off when I speak . Example- had court date last week and Cafcass lady ( first I’d seen of here in 8 years) says are you so n so , I said yes , she says I have a report for you to read . I read it and looked at her and said are your reports based on one sided opinion when it comes to a child’s well being ? She says no and report isn’t one sided . I then asked her the credentials she has - she didn’t like that but- after she tells me I then said great - I’ve ascertained your clever enough to understand the term one sided report . To clarify - have you spoke to ex - she says yes - have you spoke to myself - she says no - is that not one sided ??? It took 20 minutes to debate that fact where as now court adjourned till she interviews myself . How do you reckon that’s going to go ? They seem to be biased , angry , and don’t care about the child’s needs what so ever . Love the part they say I’m here fir the best fir your child - I’m like really - do you know my daughter , what’s her fav colour , food, movie, place , etc .. How could you possibly be here for the best when they have no idea of the past with in that family . Mate I feel for you and every other dad out there . I don’t understand something that’s become an epidemic isn’t looked at . I’m sure there are terrible people out there and I assume the fall out of the few good ones that get hurt don’t matter. I can assure you they hear me and will continue. I kissed [censored] , smiled , jumped through years of hoops , even signed stuff - never do - but won’t anymore as it makes you seem weak to them , makes their jobs easy to just believe the lies . Yes they hold the cards and I keep asking why aren’t I seeing my daughter- never get an answer in the past two years of these latest episodes. It’s proven she lies but still it goes on in courts. Are the courts better than the CPS or detectives who put in countless hours of investigations to come to conclusion it’s all BS. Wait the court takes verbal diarrhoea from ex and that’s gospel after all
Proven BS . How does one deal with such a lack of disregard fir ones life ???? Stay strong my brother and be prepared to have your brain broken. Exercise a lot to keep brain healthy . It will eat your up alive .
Regards