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I have a child arrangements order in place for my son which says he lives with his mother and spends time with me building up to overnights.
The mother opposes that he stays with me overnight and told me she won’t make him available to stay overnight and will instead pursue a variation. Her argument is that the child is too young ( he’s 2), becomes upset when she mentions my name, doesn’t want to see me, and staying with me overnight is emotional distressing. She proposes that we wait until he can talk so he can tell us how he feels about staying with me overnight.
There is an order in place and I’ve applied for enforcement. She responded with a C2 asking for a variation. She is still making him available to see me during the day, but not overnight as ordered by court.
Despite the mother’s opposition, I’ve been able to secure that he stay with me overnight once. The mother then came to my flat uninvited and left a message in my phone saying, “I’m outside your flat, please return child to me”. I wasn’t home at the time. I didn’t return the child because I had an order saying he was staying with me that night.
I’m thinking whether to apply for a non-mol against the mother coming around to my house to intimidate me while attempting to breach the court order.
My question is, if the non mol was successful, how would that affect me seeing the child ?
I'd be interested to know also, as at the moment my boyfriend is too frightened to report his ex's intimidation to the police, because of the effect on contact. We'd like to k is the answer on this...
From what i can make out an NMO will only hinder contact and could be use as a reason to make hand over difficult and awkward and delay any court decisions.
I had bail conditions once that i couldnt contact wife at the time and during the family court hearing regarding residence and her over reacting on everything, it made her contact with the kids a right drama. I had the kids living with me at the time and also won in the end as all charges against me where dropped (rightly so) and she never even bothered to turn up to the final hearing.
What i can say is that if you have an over night stay order and she turns up you could call the police as a breach of peace on her behalf. the police will say its a civil dispute but with the paperwork in hand just remind them that your calling regarding a criminal offence for which the police can act apon. the police will investigate the matter and go with the court order you show them and then should ask her to leave and not come back, otherwise she will risk being arrested for breach of the peace. This will also be noted by the police and can be used in your court hearing as evidence.
Sadly as a man you need to protect yourself as its easier for a woman to get an NMO against us. i would have no contact with her till the next time you are due the child and if she come round again "claiming to collect child) use the police to your advantage.
It would put further strain on your parenting relationship. As you weren't at home anyway, i don't believe a NMO application would be successful.
It's always advisable to pick your battles wisely, I don't believe this is one of those times.
I'd be interested to know also, as at the moment my boyfriend is too frightened to report his ex's intimidation to the police, because of the effect on contact. We'd like to k is the answer on this...
If the intimidation is out of hand, of course he should report it to the police. However, it is likely to put further strain on the relationship between them and she could well use denial of contact with their child to punish him.
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