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hi folks
just wanted to say ive read a few of the threads on here and it seems like an excellent supportive bunch of people, which is great to be part of
just a quick brief of my situation
i separated from my ex approx 8 months ago...she called the police after a verbal row but there was no further action as they found it to be all lies, and she admitted there had been no violence. so now shes bitter that she couldnt screw me over as she wanted to.
I am currently going through the courts re child contact and have seen my 2 year old at contact centre for now till the next hearing so will hopefully progress to home contact as the reports have been positive.
My problem now is this....the day she left..she called police who turned up and took her with them.
no statements or arrests. she took a lot of her things including jewellery that she was wearing and some that she packed in a bag. I mentioned to the police to take a note of what she was taking but they werent interested and said its a civil matter.
A Week or so later she returned again with police to collect the remainder of her things without a court order which i allowed as they were no good to me. So now shes took everything that she owned and belonged to her.
I have a police contact card stating 'assisted with property removal' with the date on it, which was 7 months ago.
But being the hungry gold digger she is, she probably needs some extra cash so recently been texting me demanding items of jewellery and clothing which i dont have, and there is nothing of hers belonging at my home.
She is threatening me saying if i dont give her the items (which dont exist) or pay a sum of cash in replacement then she will take me to court.
Surely she cant just do that..and there must be rules etc ..i wish i had listed the items one by one the day she left and got her to sign for them,
What are the requirements for her to take me to court...proof of purchase, proof i have such an item if it exists in my possession...can anyone shed some light on this matter before i speak to a solicitor
Will my contact card stating assisted with property removal be enough as proof to say shes took everything
thanks in advance
Hi there
Without much experience of this situation, I don't think she has much of a case, why leave it 7 months if she had property missing, wouldn't she have asked for it sooner?
I very much doubt a criminal case can be brought, so she's talking about small claims court and the onus of proof would be on her. She would also have to pay to take it to court and the fees are dependent on the value of the items she wants to claim for. She would have to provide receipts etc and the judge would most definitely wonder why she had left it so long.
That's just my opinion, as I said I'm no expert on situations like this.
Best of luck with with your contact case.
ok thanks mojo
i will speak to a solicitor aswell but my understanding is the same, i have proof of police contact card stating clearly the date and 'assisted in property removal' and its only recently she messaged me asking for jewellery.
I havent bothered replying to her texts /demands unless the text is about our child just because i dont want to get into a pointless argument that will just wind me up and if i end up loosing my temper and insulting her on text it wont look good on me
I am hoping the contact will improve and move to home contact soon as i cant see any outstanding issues, the reports have been positive.
I assume the courts only use a contact centre as interim contact and to re instate a bond after a time of seperation? the lady taking the payment (£40 an hr) told me im lucky (lol) that 1 guy had been seeing his kids there for 5 years as he ran out of cash for courts and his missus didnt agree to home contact!
and also i assume they know that a contact centre is no place to bond with a child...the room i see our child doesnt even have a sink! and i get watched like a hawk and when i asked if i could have a video made of me and my son playing together for memories the support worker said she had to go and ask a superior...despite the previous ones not having an issue with it at all. It is a really awkward environment and makes you feel under pressure.
Not only this but our child is upset at handover as a complete stranger takes him from his mum then carries him to the room...so he starts off every session crying and it takes me a couple of minutes to settle him. Then he spends the whole session wondering where his mum is and cant settle properly.
The whole system is a disgrace
Hi there
I agree completely with what you say about the contact centres, strictly speaking they should only be used where there are real safeguarding issues, but far too often they are used to placate an obstructive mother, where a lot of it is do with her need to contol. It's shocking that a father can be caught in limbo with his child for 5 years all because of a lack of finances to move it forward...whatever happened to British justice!
Hopefully, with the positve reports that you've mentioned, the court will move contact out of the centre. If there's anything we can help with, post in the legal eagle section and someone will try and help.
Best of luck
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