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Hi,
I'm a 23 year old father to be, my girlfriend is 12 weeks pregnant with our first child. We just had a really bad argument today and I said things I didn't mean! She said we are done, as in its over between us. I responded by saying "best news all day" and acted as f I didn't care and couldn't give a [censored]! She continued to say it's done so I left the room. She then sent me two long text messages when I went to out to the shops, they basically said she has had enough and when we argue I become eveil with my words and say things I later regret.
I know I say things that I shouldn't when we argue and then it's to late to take back as they are already said. I know I have an issue with my temper and words and need to resolve this, but I feel she is going to leave me and she is expecting my child which makes me more scared and not knowing what to do?
If anyone can be of some help with advice I would really appreciate it as I am lost in what to do.
Thank you in advance
Jordy
First and foremost mate you'd better start grovelling and make sure you don't snap at her again, her head will be all over the place because she is pregnant, a woman scorned at the best of times is bad enough but when she is pregnant you're screwed my friend.
If you love her and want to be with her and your baby you are going to have to play it very careful from now on she holds all the cards as she is carrying your baby and she will unleash [censored] on you and she can stop you having anything to do with your child so be very very careful.
You best get yourself to the flower shop and you best buy her some of her favourite chocolates and grovel, don't crowd her I know you will be crapping it as you're going to be a dad so be there for her and support her but don't over do it 🙂
..;. and I would also look at anger management - hopefully it will help you to recognise what the triggers are, and how you can best manage the situations. If she sees that you recognise there is an issue and that you are prepared to do something about it, then that might just help you both move forward from this.
Hi,
Thank you for the advice. Have started with the grovelling. It be a good start to trying to make things better.
I do love her and want to be with her and our baby. That's my fear of repeating what happened today and her leaving me and me not having any contact with our baby, if she's doesn't leave this time.
Not sure what is happening as yet as we haven't talked properly yet. Will need to speak with her when things have settled to see what is happening and start making it up if I stil have the chance.
Will be taking your advice with getting her flowers and chocolates it be a good strart to making it up.
Again thanks for your help, means a lot 🙂
Jordy
Hi Moderator,
Thank you for your reply and advice.
I am seriously considering looking into anger management to try and resolve the underlining issues of my anger. She said she walks on egg shells when we argue and that hurts as I know am causing her anxiety and that's not right.
I can't loose her and my baby especially when it's something I can fix.
Really apprieate the advice, thanks again.
Jordy
If you are drinking or using drugs that may be a factor in your anger it was for me the only thing you can do is knock them on the head i'm afraid.
Yeah just keep your cool about everything & allow her to be ridiculous to you coz that is what pregnant nutters do.
You've got a good opportunity here that a lot of guys like myself & MrSlim never got. We got excluded from absolutely everything from day one through no fault of our own & without reason.
Don't make things worse for yourself.
Hi Jordy
I agree with actd in that going on a Anger Management Course will help in a big way, it will make things stronger between you and your girlfriend in that you are showing her that you are committing to getting help with your anger issues therefore she wont have to walk on egg shells around you,dont let what you have slip away from you all because of an anger issue, get it sorted and be a family unit like you want, if you feel yourself getting angry at all in the future then walk away and go for a walk or run or if possible get a punch bag fitted somewhere so that can take the punishment.
Hope you have sorted things though so keep us all posted on your situation
get a punch bag fitted somewhere so that can take the punishment.
Proven stress relief method. I have one in my spare room. The only problem is I need to get a heavier one fitted since I hit so hard & my current bag is only 25kgs.
One other problem is that I broke tendons in my left hand from training so hard.
But still worth it.
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