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Has any one ever got over the issues of integrating families?
I am a father of 4 boys, 2 with my current and 2 with my ex wife. I see my oldest 2 every weekend as they stay Friday-Sunday and we usually have little issues as expected.
This year myself and partner went on holiday with the youngest 2 and her parents (holiday was paid for by her dad) and me feeling bad told my oldest 2 we will all go on holiday soon, now we are yet to get away anywhere but my partners dad is planning the same again for next year, with no thought to my eldest two, it's become a case of we go again with my oldest 2 missing out again or as I have chosen, I'm not going as it's not fair for my oldest 2 not to be involved, but by saying this, it stops my partner and youngest two going. Either way someone will be upset.
Hello Spriggs86,
If you go again next year can you take the oldest two to join the family holiday and offer to pay for them yourself?
As for saying to the eldest two that you will take them "on holiday soon," having said that, I do feel you need to do something with them and keep to what you said you would do. Would your wife agree to you taking them for a weekend away so they do not feel left out of the fun, then you can give them your full attention and not be distracted by others wanting your time.
Do talk to your wife and explain how you feel.
I agree with MoaF....I'm sure if you explain how bad you feel about leaving them out a second time and offer to contribute to the extra cost there shouldn't be a problem, but if there is then I would say go with your current family, but organise a holiday with your older two as well.
It's can be tough being a step parent, perhaps your partner feels the need for a break from that situation....definitely you should have a good talk about it and get the air cleared.
Best of luck
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