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It sounds like you're trying to screw things up on purpose again honestly mate you are your own worst enemy :/
you might be wise to edit your post without your daughters name
I had read your post before you deleted it and it was my thought that you could get counselling through your GP which would be free to access.
I think you might like to ask your doctor about a referral to an anger management course too, as it does sound like you may have some unresolved issues with your ex, anger management can help with this and teach you strategies to deal with this.
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