Welcome to the DAD.Info forum: Important Information – open to read:
Our forum aims to provide support and guidance where it can, however we may not always have the answer. The forum is not moderated 24 hours a day, so If you – or someone you know – are being harmed or in immediate danger of being harmed, call the police on 999.
Alternatively, if you are in crisis, please call Samaritans on 116 123.
If you are worried about you or someone you know is at risk of harm, please click here: How we can help
It's been a tough few months and it's not over yet. I had contact with my son, then my ex decided to give me indirect contact only, she had accused me of harassment and attempted assault on her husband, neither being true. This was all a reaction to me attempting meditation. I'm now going to court, but by the time that happens I won't have seen my son for 6 months and my ex has told cafcas that she hasn't been giving my son my letters as they are filled with too much positive stuff and he might feel left out. She is deliberately alienating me, hoping I will just disappear. He's my son so I would never do that. Just feeling frustrated
Hi there
Court can be an awfully slow process, it usually takes between 4 - 8 weeks from application to the first hearing. Have you got a court date?
Did Cafcass give any reaction to her reason for withholding your letters? Did you keep copies?
Once Cafcass have prepared their safeguarding report, it will give you a better idea of any recommendations they make.
They will check if you or your ex have any previous involvement with the police and social services. If there’s no history of harassment or assault against her husband, the court should want to move things forward relatively quickly.
It might be a good idea to prepare a short position statement to take with you to the hearing, just to tell the court a little background, any concerns you have and what you would like the court to do... no more re than a couple of pages and keep it about your child, avoiding any [censored] for tat.
Best of luck
I was meant to be in court next week, but the ex is pregnant and expecting, so she got it adjourned, so new date is August, that's why i won't have contact for 6 months. There is no police involvement and cafcas we check that, even though the ex said i was reported and the police are involved, yet I have not heard from the either. Cafcas have said there shouldn't be any reason why I shouldn't stay seeing my son again straight away and recommended telephone and Skype up till the hearing, as of yet nothing. Cafcas said the reason for her not taking my son the letter is in doing to many positive things with my life and he's missing out. What am I meant to do wallow in self pity, surely he don't want to hear that. Thanks for the advice on the statement, I'll start preparing that over the next couple of weeks.
That’s such a pity, you could give Cafcass a call and explain that the hearing has been adjourned and ask if it would be possible for them to liaise with the mother to try and set up some form of indirect contact. Perhaps suggest that contact could resume in a contact centre until,the next hearing, purely as your son will be missing you and it’s in his interest to avoid any further distress or anxiety.
I'm seeing my second son in a weeks time, I'll ask if my son can ring us both, it is fathers day after all. If nothing I'll do that. Thanks
Welcome to the DAD.info forum.
We don’t like to set ‘rules’, but to make sure that you and the other dads are kept safe, we have some requests. When engaging with the forum, please be aware of the following:
- The forum is not moderated 24 hours per day.
- Many of the moderators do so on a voluntary basis. Whilst they may be able to provide some guidance, advice or support, they may not be able to deal with specifics.
- We are not an emergency crisis service so if you or someone else is in immediate danger, please call emergency services.
- If you are concerned about the safety of a child, please click here to find the support you can get for them (link to new page)
- If you are in crisis, please call Samaritans on 116 123. They are open 24 hours a day, 7 days per week.
We hope you find this forum a supportive environment and thank you for joining us.