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Please can anyone help ? I havent seen my children for 3 years despite contacting them via txt everyday with no replies.My ex and I split up in 2010 shortly after my father died which I took badly.At first I saw both my children regularly. I had my daughter for 2 to 3 days a week and coached and saw my son often. Over the first year of seperation, my ex made it more difficult to see my children. This become worse between us and eventually I didnt see my children at all despite all my efforts. Over the next few months not seeing my children was hurting me so much that I decided to move back to my home town 350 miles away. I continued to phone and txt my children daily even though i wasnt sure if they still had the numbers as I never recieved any replies.
I was advise about a Parental Responsibility Order but at the time I was unemployed and couldnt afford the £250 fee. As time went on and I became more and more heartbroken and deepsressed, I plunged into a dark place and attempted to take my own life. If it wasnt for some very close friends I wouldnt be here today. However I am still unable to se my children, I dont even know where they live ! This is my last chance that someone might be able to help me,give me some advise or some guidance as to what I can do to have some sort of chance of just speaking with my children
Hi there
I'm really sorry to hear what you've been going through. Are you not named on the birth certificate? Or were the children born before December 2003?
The difficulties posed here are firstly the distance and secondly the fact that you haven't had contact with them for such a long time, but these things are not insurmountable and indirect contact with your children should be attainable at the very least.
You need to locate them and this can be done by submitting a Seek and Find application to the court, at the same time you can apply for Parental Responsibility and contact.
I think it might be a good idea if you were to attend a Families Need Fathers meeting in your area. You will get face to face advice and support and meet parents in a similar situation. Here's a link to their webpage...the meetings are generally free to attend.
www.fnf.org.uk/help-and-support-2/local-branch-meetings
Thank you do much for your advice. I am truly at my wits end over this. I would crawl across broken glass to see my children my ex has put so much rubbish into their heads. I've never had the right of reply with my children so therefore I've never had the chance to explain or be there. My ex even told my children I wasn't paying CSA. even though I pay £60 per week for my daughter as my son is 20 now. We were not married and my children were born before 2003. I am present on their birth certificate and was a good dad and was in there lives everyday until our split in 2010.
....your son at 20 is now too old for any application to court, the cut off age is 16, does that put court out of reach for your daughter too?
I would suggest looking on social network sites, this is the way young people interact with friends these days and you might be lucky. The only other suggestion is to hire a private detective or tracing agency....there are lots of the, on the Internet. I used one called the Scottish dude back in 2009 and he successfully traced someone for me. It was affordable. There are plenty of tracing agencies, just do your homework on them before committing. Good luck.
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