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Been divorced 3 years and my ex took my kids to Isle of man, she told the court that she would bring them to see us as often as she could (well that was a lie).
The only way I can see my kids is if I pay the plane fares plus I have to go and collect them and take them back. I haven't seen my girls now since August. I have the most selfish mum who can afford the plane fares so she has them every holiday. I don't get any say in anything, so my mum has got the girls for 2 weeks in Easter and won't bring them down, which is only at 3 hour drive.
Where do I stand
Is there any contact agreement in place? It might be worth having a word with the Coram Childrens Legal Centre (there's a link at the bottom of the forum) to check on jursidication with the Isle of Man as that may add complications.
As far as I know, it was just on the divorce letter, I saw the girls for a total of 3 weeks last year, all the rest of the times my mum has had them, she is totally obsessed with my girls as she pays no attention to my son .
I am not in work is have ill health so cannot physically pay for flights which cost about £400 return. The ex has never paid any of the fares its always been me or my mum.
Have asked my mum if she could bring them down to see me but she has declined.
I feel I have no say in where my children go it is all arranged by my ex and mum.
Is there no way you could get to your mums to see your girls?
I have a prolapsed disc and urine retention so cannot drive for more that 20 mins due to being in so much pain
It may be worth considering getting the order varied to get your ex to bring them to you sometimes - it's a very slim chance, but based on your condition, you may as well give it a shot as you don't really have much to lose by trying. You'd also need to check on the position of the court order in the Isle of Man
In the short term, at Easter, would your condition be more manageable if you didn't drive but used the train or coach service to get to your Mums.
Its a bit more complex than just the back trouble am being investigate now for rare cancers and prostate cancer I'm only 36, coach journey is 8 hours and train is 5, I just cannot handle anything in that time frame in the condition I am in at the moment.
It is wrenching me apart not seeing my girls, and cannot believe how my mum is, its as though she doesn't care, she has got a very unhealthy attitude towards the girls and very obsessive over them.
I wouldn't mind but my mum has a new grandson here and she doesn't even see him, in her eyes its just the 2 girls
Just don't know what to do
...I'm really sorry to hear about your struggle to see your children, sometimes it's so frustrating when the advice we can give is so limited as is the case here.
All I can suggest is that you continue to try and get through to your mother, does she know that you are so ill? Could you speak to your ex and ask her to talk to your mother on your behalf? This must be very difficult for you.
Yeah have spoke to my mum but she 's in the mind set that everything is fine.
My mum used to hate my ex when we was married, but now she thinks the sun shines out of her [censored], she will do no wrong to upset her as she believes she will stop her seeing the girls, plus my ex's loves the fact that she gets rid of the kids and my mum foots the bill.
My ex talks more to my mum than she does me, she doesn't even inform me if there are any health problems with the girls I end up finding it out via mum.
All in all don't think I have any hope of seeing my girls which really upsets me.
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