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Hello
Me and my ex girlfriend split up about 15 weeks ago. She is 35 weeks pregnant.
About 4 weeks ago she asked me to stop texting her as she wanted time to think about what will happen at the birth and afterwards.
I have her her time and sent her a text and she said she still needs time. In away I understand because she has 4 kids with her ex partner and it's the summer holidays. But I said anything can happen from now till the both date. But still not heard anything back.
All I have asked her is if I can be around at the birth and spend time with my son when he is born.
I don't think it's that hard of a thing to think about. I think it's important for a dad to share that moment and very important to bond with there child.
I'm not sure on my legal rights ? And over shared living 50-50.
The other thing is all I have been doing is trying to be supported and brought everything for the baby.
But feel like she closing me out of everything.
Any help would be good
Hi and welcome to the forum
I'm sorry to read this, we've had quite a few Dads here who have had very similar experiences.
Unfortunately, until the baby arrives, there's nothing you can do legally.
It sounds like you've done the right thing so far by giving her space, I would suggest that you continue to try and give her time but let her know that you are there for her, want to support her and be part of it all.
If she still wants time or asks you to leave her alone, sadly, you will need to listen to that for now. If you persist when she has told you not to, she could go to the police for harassment. Her hormones will be all over the place at the minute and she may well come round as the birth approaches or when your child arrives.
Once the baby arrives, if she still won't interact with you or let you be involved then you would have to consider mediation before anything else. Other than mediation, the only other route is an application to the court but it's mandatory to attempt mediation first.
50/50 shared care isn't something that is usually achieved with very young babies, it would have to be something that you work towards over time and isn't an automatic legal right. The rights to contact are of the child, not the parents although if you are added to the birth certificate, you will have Parental Responsibility for matters such as medical and education.
Good luck
Ok thank you for that.
I totally understand she needs time to think and it's the summer holidays and has 4 kids.
But feel communication is really important, and if she can communicate now it's going to be hard when our son is born.
All I want is the best for our son and to be brought up by two parents that love him and can communicate in a good way and shows him that life goes on wihen two people split up.
I will keep strong because I know I have done everything right, just feel lost not knowing what is going on.
yed you are right I can not legal do anything till the baby is born and fingers crossed she contacts me when she goes to hospital so I can be there and spend time with my son.
The last thing I want to do is go through the the courts but if she does not leave me any opinion then that's what I will have to do.
There is more behind the story, as her ex was not a very nice person and if he is going to be around my son then will have to take steps for the safety of my son
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