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[Solved] haven't seen my kids in 5 years need help

 
(@danny18)
Active Member Registered

haven't seen my kids in 5 years im looking for help the mother of my kids now 6 and 11yrs old got in contact with me on Facebook after so long of me trying to connect with her after she just up and moved to a different state it was [censored] for me but now she trying to work something out i just want to talk to my girls but i know its not going to be a over nite thing she told me my oldest dos not want to talk to me i told her

In my opinion i feel she needs to know why things happened, in a way she can understand as a young girl. Not every single detail, but i think the best is that we are as honest as we can be with her. I want her to know that this is never what i wanted. Im not trying to put all the blame on you in any way so please don't take it that way, but i feel like it's important for her to know that i didn't just abandon them. I think that we should follow her lead, and go at her pace. But also you and me talk with each other to figure out what we can make work at the point where she is ready

wat more can i say

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Topic starter Posted : 19/07/2019 5:54 am
 Mojo
(@Mojo)
Illustrious Member Registered

Hi there

I think you’re right to take things at your child’s pace, giving her space and time to get used to you being back in her life, will help her I’m sure.

I’m not so sure about her need to know all the details, but answering her questions as and when she asks, in an honest but gentle way will help her. Children are resilient and if she sees you and your ex working together, that should also help too.

All the best

ReplyQuote
Posted : 19/07/2019 12:57 pm
 Mojo
(@Mojo)
Illustrious Member Registered

... In case you’re wondering, I’ve deleted your duplicate post, it can be confusing if two separate conversations get started on two separate threads, about the same topic.

ReplyQuote
Posted : 19/07/2019 1:00 pm
(@danny18)
Active Member Registered

no problem ty didn't mean to post 2 times

ReplyQuote
Topic starter Posted : 19/07/2019 9:38 pm
(@danny18)
Active Member Registered

The only reason why I mention to be Open and honest with her Is because over the years I don't know what was said about me to my kids I tried contacting her Several times throughout the years And I know the type of person she is She told me that my daughter is not sure about talking to me And I told her mom that she needs to be the one to encourage it if that makes any sense What kind of things Should she say to my daughter

ReplyQuote
Topic starter Posted : 19/07/2019 9:45 pm
(@dadmod2)
Illustrious Member

hi danny

check this out:

https://www.standalone.org.uk/guides/parents/

ReplyQuote
Posted : 22/07/2019 1:04 am
(@danny18)
Active Member Registered

will do thanks

ReplyQuote
Topic starter Posted : 27/07/2019 9:15 am
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