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First time posting - Am I alone?

 
(@justadad82)
New Member Registered

Hey!

This is my first time posting after the site was recommended to me by a counsellor at work. Things aren't great (hence the counsellor) but I feel alone as I don't really have any friends and my partner (understandably) isn't too keen on all our conversations being about the difficulties I am having with my 12yr old daughter and my ex-wife.

I have two daughters (12 and 9) and an ex-wife who I am just realising is rather narcissistic and manipulative. Ironic really as I am a Social Worker who navigates the actions of abusive people for a living yet I haven't been able to see that in my ex. 

Well, the last 3 weeks will go down as the hardest so far in my life. I could write a whole biography on it so will keep that for other posts. I have read through some of the posts on here and there seems to be some friendly and helpful contributors. 

For now, I just want to say Hi and I hope over time, I too can become someone who helps others in challenging times. 

JustADad82 ☕  

Quote
Topic starter Posted : 28/02/2023 3:47 pm
Mdye219 and DadMod2 reacted
(@dadmod2)
Illustrious Member

hi. welcome to the forum.

what kind of issues are you having with your kids and ex?

ReplyQuote
Posted : 28/02/2023 6:12 pm
(@kieransav)
New Member Registered

I’m having some what have been major issues with access to my daughter i my daughter was kept away from me for three months and even now I only get to see her once a fortnight. All based on allegations with out a shred of evidence

this isn’t equal rights

now I have a question if anyone has had experience. 
has anyone on here had a hair strand test, what does it involve exactly and how far back did the request the test to go? How far back can it go? I’ve had conflicting answers when looking online

many thanks and sorry if I’ve bored you

 

ReplyQuote
Posted : 01/03/2023 3:30 pm
(@dadmod2)
Illustrious Member

@kieransav hi. With drug testing, every case is different. Been in touch with dads that only had to take 1 hair strand. Others have been ordered by court to take regular tests every few months etc. 

 

more info; https://frg.org.uk/get-help-and-advice/why/drug-and-alcohol-misuse/how-might-childrens-services-or-the-family-court-look-into-someones-alcohol-or-drug-use/

ReplyQuote
Posted : 01/03/2023 8:33 pm
(@headspace)
Estimable Member Registered

Hi there and welcome to the site.

Sorry to hear that you’re having difficulties and I am glad that your counselor had recommended this site, that’s exactly how I was introduced to it in 2016. 
It can be difficult to deal with one issue (an ex with kids) when you have pressure from a current relationship. 
I think the first thing I would do is talk to your current partner and explain that you cannot control the actions of your ex and you still have a responsibility to your kids.   If she’s willing, ask her for her support, advice and guidance. That way, she will feel part of it and not left out whilst you deal with your ex and the issues you have with her.

as for being a social worker and you say you should have seen these behaviors, when it comes you your own family the feelings and what we see are different.


 

ReplyQuote
Posted : 10/03/2023 8:31 pm
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