[Solved] First Hearing tomorrow-final advice or tips?

I'll leave the advice to those more knowledgeable than myself. I hope the hearing goes well and wish you all the very best.

Thank you 🙂

Good luck for tomorrow it seems like you know what you are doing and well prepared 🙂

Here's a post which I wrote after my first hearing I hope it helps 🙂

Hey Guy's, I thought I'd write a guide on self representing in Court as when you are barred from your Child your head is absolutely all over the place and you feel like you have nowhere to turn I wish someone could of pointed me in the right direction.

Now I will only tell you about my experience and neither I or my ex had Solicitors (thank the lord)

So first and for most more than likely Mediation has failed you have been issued with your FM1 form from the Mediator which enables you to make an application to court.

You have filled out your C100 form and received your first Court hearing date, this will be called a "Directions Hearing" and that's basically a hearing when the Judge or Magistrates will Direct which way the case will go and make an Order for the next hearing.

Now if there is mention of any abuse towards your ex or your Child, Cafcass will become involved who basically represent the Child and their only concern is for the Child.

You may have received a Telephone call from them which they produced an S2 report for the Court at the Directions hearing and they will be a court Cafcass officer present during the hearing.

So the day has arrived for your first hearing it will seem very daunting indeed but you have to go in there prepared, find out the Address of the Court before hand and make sure you plan your route arrive as early as you can. Take with you money for parking, Food and Coffee.

Make sure you are looking the muts nuts too, Clean shaven, smart suit but a shirt and tie will suffice and what ever you don't do what I did and buy some new shoes and not wear them in, honestly I couldn't walk for 2 weeks after with 6 50p size blisters on my feet! lol

As I said arrive early get the security to tell you where the usher is and they will direct you to where your court hearing will be and what time if they're running late or whatever.

Be nice to absolutely everyone you meet you will be treated with the upper most respect so make sure you return it I can't stress this enough you do not want to be seen in a bad light at all, If your EX is in the waiting room Ignore her completely maybe a nod but thats it as it could kick off and you don't want that.

When you enter the court room you and your ex will sit at the back you will have a court legal adviser or clerk of the court one side then a Cafcass officer the other and in front of you the Judges or Magistrates.

What your body language don't interupt anyone ever you WILL be given your chance to speak when your ex starts unleashing all the lies and false allegations DO NOT REACT in any way don't shake your head nothing remain cool calm and composed at all times.

Remain extra cool when the Cafcass officer speaks you will not agree with one thing they say but as before keep cool and calm these people hold more weight in court than anyone so don't pi** them off no matter what you do they will and can make or break everything.

The hearing may seem all against you but don't lose heart it may be the same at the next hearing but thinks will start to turn your way as the case goes on trust me.

I found it all so daunting but when I got in the Court room I found I started to enjoy it and I still do it's been the hardest 6 months since I started the fight and they has been some serious lows and only a few highs but in a strange way I feel I'm a better person for it there's something liberating standing up there and fighting for your flesh and blood be warned though it is a bit of a roller coaster of emotions but you will get there.

Now the outcome for me was that I got a terrible report off Cafcass they basically believed every lie my ex came out with and I got nailed by them but they did recommend I be part of my Childs life.

The Court ordered I do a drug test, attend a SPIPS course and I had to produce a letter from my GP to say I went to see him to give up my Drug addiction then they arranged a review hearing in 3 months.

So all in all I'd say go for it self representing it really isn't as daunting as you think I am way further on that anyone I know with a Solicitor and never ever give up the fight.

Good luck

Slim 🙂

Cheers slim. Ive read allot of your posts (including this one ;)) and have taken advice and inspiration from them all, its nice to know your not alone. Just hoping for a decent judge, cafcass officer i think is the same as last time, and he seemed decent enough. Know its gonna be a long trek, but it cant be any worse than the 4.5hrs a week contact me and my daughter currently have. Ill post an update tomorrow. Thanks for the support guys

Good luck!

I hope it goes well, please let us know how it goes.

Yeah man that's the spirit you've got the right attitude just take it step by step jump through the hoops tick all the boxes show that you are pro active and you'll be sound.

It's a year to the day since my first hearing and I've gone from not seeing my new born daughter at all to having her the whole weekend every weekend now so that gives you an idea of time scale, play the long game and you'll be fine 🙂

Good luck for today and keep us posted 🙂

Slim 🙂

hope it all goes well for you and after reading some of the comments are giving me some encouragement as i am now putting in my application and will be going through this soon. all the best i have put on a post on the forum about the c100 and the c1a forms. i got 3 copies of each. and not sure if i send them all back or just 1 copy of each

Hi guys, appologies I havnt updated sooner. Well the day came and went, didn't go horribly but not as good as I was expecting. Went infront of the judge, case was me applying for an order (varience on the original to include longer contact and overnight) , and ex wants residency order. Then we were put into a room with a mediator to try and establish some arrangements. We both agreed (which are stated as 'agreed interim arrangements') that I would have my daughter on a wednesday and every other saturday, Wednesday for a few hours after school, and saturday contact starting off at 4 hours, increasing by an hour every fortnight until mid June. Next hearing (dispute resolution appointment) is at the beginning of June, so Im hoping to progress contact even further on the weekends and see where I am in regards to overnights. Key issues are: whether it's in the best interests of my daughter to have a residence order, and whether current arrangements should be extended to have overnight contact with her. Ahhhh, I can see this going all the way to a final hearing.

Anyway, I've learnt from this (refer to your notes!!!) as I got involved in mediation and forgot to mention key parts of what I'd noted-mainly holidays. This I will take with me next time and make sure all the points are covered, as if its not in the order, my ex will just say 'It's not in the order', and I'm stuck.

So just to wait for next appointment now

Sounds like things are chugging along nicely hearings never go as good as you would like but at least theres a decent time table of progressive contact in place you will get there just play the long game and I'm sure it will all pan out 🙂

As a simple rule, have a single piece of paper bullet pointed of everything you need to cover, and then post-it note markers in you main file (possibly cross referenced to your summary sheet) for anything you may need to refer to quickly.