Welcome to the DAD.Info forum: Important Information – open to read:
Our forum aims to provide support and guidance where it can, however we may not always have the answer. The forum is not moderated 24 hours a day, so If you – or someone you know – are being harmed or in immediate danger of being harmed, call the police on 999.
Alternatively, if you are in crisis, please call Samaritans on 116 123.
If you are worried about you or someone you know is at risk of harm, please click here: How we can help
Today I received a letter from the ex's solicitor claiming unsupervised visits will not happen because i cannot look after them well enough? Apparently, whilst having supervised visits, I have lost both the children, they have got hurt and I do not pay any attention to them. All of this in a soft play area? i knew this would never be straight forward, so now I have to deal with courts believing the mum and stopping the unsupervised, although for years I have looked after them on my own, taken them out on my own and they have never been hurt in my care.
I honestly want to give up, I cannot be bothered to constantly fight lies
Ignore its your ex causing problems. keep fighting. if you really done any of the above nonsense then there would be evidence from people and your ex to support this. Its the same answer its not factual and didn't happen and has been said out of malice
+1 to warwickshire1 comment.
The courts aren't stupid, and your kids will be grateful to know you were and are making a proactive effort to be in their lives.
What route you take (with or without representation) is ultimately up to you, but it may be helpful to keep a clear record of visits, a few pics etc - it certainly was in my case to remove the he said, she said from the situation. It will save both you and the courts time when answering spurious allegations.
I'd be extremely surprised to hear different from the professionals. Wherever it is safe for a child, their focus is on progressing contact to a natural, safe and consistent environment (i.e. not just in a soft play area but with as wide a family unit as possible).
Keep strong, it's not easy but our responsibility as parents who love our children.
CD.
hi ferfer,
do you know if your ex is getting legal aid? my ex scammed it. lost it after i snitched on her. she could be making my life [censored] right now if she was still getting legal aid.
I believe she is now having to pay legal fees now? The issue is, the supervised visits are carried out by my ex's parents. I requested in court that I can bring a family member to protect myself from lies as I knew they would make things up. Which they have done!!!
Each time i have seen them, it has been in a soft play area. Apparently I lost the children in there (which is next to impossible) I talked to other parents and one of my daughters got pushed over playing football. Apparently, this is concerning to my ex. They do not write how excited and pleased my kids are to see me, how much they tell me they miss me and want me to come home.
It is funny how when i was at a contact centre being watched by an unbiased person, they had nothing but positive things to say about me and the kids.
it is just a joke now. My solicitor has sent a letter saying if the unsupervised doe snot commence on the date stated in the order, we will take her back to court and this time demand a fact finding hearing and expose her for the liar she is. I knew it would not be the end of it after the final hearing, and I was right. I have had to refer myself to counseling because i am crippled by anxiety as I am always worrying and concerned about what she is going to do next She tried to appeal this decision, it got refused, so now she and her family are making up more lies about me.
i think you should ditch the solicitor and save your money. you could have written the same letter to her. and if she doesnt give a toss, you take her back to court.
What you need to do is either represent yourself and enforce your court order or change solicitors.
Only winner if your solicitor goes for a find a fact hearing is your solicitor getting paid thousands. A find a fact hearing is not necessary a court order needs to be followed and contact needs to be increased gradually.
Welcome to the DAD.info forum.
We don’t like to set ‘rules’, but to make sure that you and the other dads are kept safe, we have some requests. When engaging with the forum, please be aware of the following:
- The forum is not moderated 24 hours per day.
- Many of the moderators do so on a voluntary basis. Whilst they may be able to provide some guidance, advice or support, they may not be able to deal with specifics.
- We are not an emergency crisis service so if you or someone else is in immediate danger, please call emergency services.
- If you are concerned about the safety of a child, please click here to find the support you can get for them (link to new page)
- If you are in crisis, please call Samaritans on 116 123. They are open 24 hours a day, 7 days per week.
We hope you find this forum a supportive environment and thank you for joining us.