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Hello everyone! I just joined the website and I'm looking for advice if anyone can help.
I have a 7 year old daughter that my ex and I share exactly 50/50 custody. I won 50/50 custody shortly after we broke up over 5 years ago. Recently, in the last year she has meant a military man, got married, and wants to move to a different state. However, first she wants to go with and take our daughter to Korea because her new husband is being deployed there for 2 years. She is attempting to get me to agree to letting her stay in Korea for the school years and let me have the summers. I don't believe this is a fair split of the time and specially since it's her wanting to leave, I believe she should have the shorter parenting time leaving me with the school year.
We are attempting to resolve the issue on our own opposed to spending lots of money in court, but they're not budging on their position at all. I'm wondering if I have a chance to retain my 50/50 schedule with my daughter in court or the school years? How does it work if your ex wants to move away because of their new military husband being stationed somewhere else? How does this situation work when being deployed? It would absolutely break my heart to go 9 months without seeing my little girl.. Any opinions or knowledge surrounding the topic would be helpful.
Hi there
As you have a court order in place she cannot take your child out of the country without applying back to the court for leave to remove.
Will he be returning to the UK after 2 years? If that's the case then I think you are in a good position to argue that the disruption wouldn't be in your daughters best interests.
Your first step would be Mediation to try and sort this out and then court if you can't.
You would apply for a Prohibited Steps Order to prevent your ex taking your daughter out of the country.
If you were to self represent then the court fee is manageable at £215. There are many here that have taken that route.
I'll ask the Coram Childrens Legal Centre to drop by and give you some advice.
Dear critjus13,
Thank you for your enquiry.
The assumption is that you have Parental Responsibility for your daughter, but to make sure of this consult the following information. You will have Parental Responsibility for your daughter if:
• You were married to the mother at the time of your daughter’s birth; or
• You subsequently married the mother after the birth of your daughter; or
• Your daughter’s birth was registered after 01/12/2003 and you are named on your daughter’s birth certificate; or
• You have entered into a Parental Responsibility Agreement with the mother; or
• You have had a Parental Responsibility Order granted in your favour by the courts; or
• You have had residence of your daughter awarded in your favour through a Residence or Child Arrangements Order by the courts.
As has already been mentioned, if you have a Residence Order in place confirming the 50/50 arrangement then the mother would be acting in breach of this order in taking your daughter out of the jurisdiction of England and Wales without your consent. She would need to obtain your written consent or apply to court for an order authorising Removal from Jurisdiction and to discharge or vary the existing Residence Order. In doing so she will have to demonstrate that it is in the best interests of your daughter for her to move away to Korea for two years. In considering this the court will consider the welfare checklist:
• Wishes and feelings of the child (weight given to these feelings depends on the age of the child, more weight being given to a child over the age of 11).
• Child’s physical, emotional and educational needs.
• Effect of any change on the child.
• The age, [censored] and background of the child.
• Any harm which the child has suffered or may suffer.
• How capable each parent is of meeting the Childs needs.
The courts will also consider the mother’s motivation for wanting to move, the practical proposals for your daughter in Korea and any ties she has there, your reasons for opposing the move and whether it would detriment your relationship with your daughter.
In negotiating an agreement with the mother, it is important to use the above information to make your proposals to maintain the shared residence arrangement or have your daughter reside with you during school term time.
If you are unable to reach an agreement then you can attempt mediation with the mother. This would involve you, the mother and a third party mediator coming together to try and resolve this without recourse to court action. Mediation is now mandatory and must be attempted before any application to court is made. For more information on mediation and for assistance in organising this you can contact National Family Mediation on 03004000636.
If mediation does not resolve these concerns and you are unhappy with the arrangements in place then you can apply to court for a Prohibited Steps Order to prevent the mother from removing your daughter to Korea. In order to make this application you would need to use a C100 form available from your local Family Court or online at www.justice.gov.uk, the guidance leaflets CB1 and CB3 will also be relevant.
There is a fee of £215 for applying for a Prohibited Steps Order. If you are on a low income or on benefits you may be eligible for a full or partial fee exemption and should consult the fee exemption form EX160A, again available from your local Family Court or online at www.justice.gov.uk.
If you require any further advice please do not hesitate to contact us. Our advice line phone service on 08088020008 is available Mon-Fri between 8:00-20:00.
Yours Sincerely
Coram Children’s Legal Centre
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