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Hi folks
My son (21) was in a relationship with an older woman for a few years. I didn't get it, but he seemed to be very happy. Then she got pregnant and he won't acknowledge the kid and has broken up with the woman. Any advice from people who know this kind of situation?
Cheers
Meat man
Morning, what advice is it that you would like?
Hi there
Your son is still quite young but he is still an adult and as such is entitled to choose who he wants to be with. It's just such a pity that it took a child in the mix to realise what he didn't want!
From your post I get the impression that you weren't happy with the age difference, are you not happy now that your son has walked away from his responsibilities?
If he doesn't want anything to do with the child but you do, you could try approaching the mother about this because regardless of the situation, that little baby is innocent and is a part of your family.
Wondering if anyone has had success getting their son to accept an illegitimate kid. How do I show I care about him but encourage him to see being a dad aaa positive.
Thanks for responding Mojo. Yeah I wasn't too happy but I figure you've got to take the consequences of your actions. Am disappointed in my son's response to his kid. I have contacted the mum. She's been good but it hasn't changed my son any. He thinks I'm betraying him by having contact. All a bit of a mess, really.
You're between a rock and a hard place there... Your sons attitude just shows his immaturity...it's not a matter of taking sides is it. It's perfectly understandable that you would want to get to know your grandchild, he's a part of your son and you... Because you love your son then that naturally passes on to your sons offspring. I'm a grandparent, I know what your children's children mean, but you can't expect your son to get it.
I think he will come round eventually...he knows how you feel, you just have to show him that you will support him whatever he decides. There's little point in trying to make him want to be a dad at this moment in time...let it come, it will when he's ready.
Perhaps if you can build a relationship with your grandchild (if the mother doesn't obstruct) then your son may come around in time also. The problem may be that he's burning bridges with his ex, which she may not be too quick to forgive later on.
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