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Hi all I could really do with some help please.my soon to be 14 year old son was living with his mum with his brother. 2 months ago he came to us for the weekend as usual and told us he couldn’t stand living there anymore and explained his reasons including being hit and being made to feel stupid. He told
His mum and the student support at school. She obviously hit the roof but each time he tells her what the problems are she calls him a liar and says she has contacted solicitors to make him go back. He has said if she does that he will keep running away back to us.
What are the courts likely to say will they actually listen to him. I’m really worried . Thanks for all help in advance
Hi,
the courts/social services will definitely take your childs views into consideration because of his age. it will get to the point where your kids will start running back and forth between your house and their mums whenever they feel like. you need this to be cemented in a court order. you should seek legal advice and think about applying for shared care court order, or sole custody.
sole custody is likely to be a very nasty battle. i know someone who said they spent £100,000 in legal fees, by battling with ex to get sole custody. and in the end they got a 50/50 shared care order. but it all depends on the situation. if your kids are suffering neglect, and getting beat up, then in theory it should go in favor of sole custody for you.
Hi there
It’s good that he’s reached out for support at school and such a pity that his Mum isn’t listening to him. If this gets to court, his wishes will be listened to and his age and the abuse he has suffered will be a factor in your favour. How long has he been with you.
You have three options, you can wait for her to make an application to court for his return, you can make an urgent application to keep him with you, or you can attempt mediation to try and reach agreement and if that fails make an application at that point. Sometimes it’s better to take the pro active approach and take the lead, by applying for an urgent application for a Prohibited Steps Order and a Child Arrangements Order for him to live with you... it doesn’t have to be a very nasty battle as Bill puts it, but there’s likely to be some allegations bandied around, as long as you remain completely child focused and calm and reasonable in all your dealings, you should be ok... you are trying to do what is best for your child.
This can be done through a solicitor, or you can self represent. There’s lots of info about the process in the stickys at the top of the legal eagle section and by using the search bar at the top of the page.
In the meantime it might help your son to contact nyas they are advocates for children’s rights and can offer you both advice and support.
www.nyas.net
Have you spoken to his school? That would be something you should do, if you haven’t already. It might be a good idea to speak to Social Services too.
If you have any questions, please don’t hesitate to ask.
All the best
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