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Hi All,
I’d appreciate some advice and thoughts on the following situation leading up to, and including Easter Hols,
On 9th March ex sent text saying kids had party on 26th March for a school friend, will I be taking them as this was my weekend with kids.
My reply was yes, please pass on all details.
18th March Ex sent “Mothers day is 26th & I hadn’t realised. With regards to Easter your weekend is the first weekend they break up from school for two weeks, are you happy with the first week and I will have the second?”. (our current interim order is for every other weekend and each Wednesday for 3 hours).
My reply was I’m happy with having kids first week of Easter, with regards Mothers day I’m happy dropping Daughter off first thing, but would like to take Son to his last competitive football match and drop him off after (in morning), are you happy with this arrangement, I would also like to agree a replacement day as the following Sunday.
Ex sent that she already had plans for mother’s day so can I drop kids off early as previously agreed.
I questioned what this ‘previous agreement’ was as I had no recollection and there was no record, and asked if kids were still going to school friend’s party that day.
On 22nd April Ex sent “children’s interests are not being affected, this (agreement) was provisional whilst we await final order, if I’d rather not go ahead with it let me know and I can make other arrangement for the children over Easter Holidays”
My reply was that there was no previous provisional agreement other that what we had just agreed for Easter and that the children were being used again as leverage and will miss out either way, I will drop kids off at 10am on 26th.
Whilst I was happy to compromise for Mothers days, she was not.
Now, whilst I was dropping kids off this Wednesday just gone (5th March), Ex brought up in conversation that she would have to check what day I was to return the kids over Easter…. Puzzled, I said that I had already made plans for the first week in Easter and left.
Thursday (yesterday night) I got a text telling me to return our children on 14th April (Good Friday), that the school Easter Holidays start when the children finish school today, and that my week is from today until next Friday as this fits in with the current interim court order. This will mean that they will not get to spend Easter Weekend with me.
Am I wrong in thinking that I’ve been well and truly played again?, My understanding is that a school week is Sunday night to Sunday night, the first week of Easter Holidays would be Monday 10th to Sunday 16th.
Following the Ex’s text a month ago my parents upgraded their holiday booking to a bigger caravan at the coast so that we could join them at the start of their holiday (starting Easter weekend), we were going to join them and come back on Sunday afternoon.
phone contact was also stopped a couple of weeks ago that had been continuing for last six months though was not specifically included in last order back in Feb but was in previous orders.... again something that she had previously tried to stop back in november hearing.
I’m tempted to stick to my guns and return on Easter Sunday evening, however am mindful that we have final hearing coming up in June…… this is the angriest that I’ve felt in quite a while....
The last day of school would be today and strictly speaking the first day of the holiday would be Saturday, that's how it's written on my grandsons school website.
is this weekend your allotted weekend to have the kids? Will she be getting two weekends in a row over the holidays? I think the best you can do is to argue your case in that way.
Does she have a solicitor? You could try writing to them to state that the division of the Easter holidays is proving difficult, with their client moving the goal posts at the last minute , after holiday arrangements have been made.
If she doesn't have a solicitor, then perhaps write to her formally and state that you have been flexible over Mother's Day and after agreement was reached over division of the Easter holidays, you had made arrangements to take them away. State that it's in the children's interests to stick to the original arrangement as not to do so would be preventing them from enjoying quality time away with you and their grandparents. If this happens you will be providing the court with details and asking for a final order that will define arrangements more stringently.
Hi Mojo.
Yes she has a solicitor...... got a further text tonight similar to weeks ago but more slick, it said...... Morning, your week starts this afternoon once they finish school which then takes you to good Friday. I am in agreement with this arrangement, please confirm that the children will be returned by 10 on Good Friday. If we are unable to agree then we need to stick to the arrangement in the current court order. It all sounds very reasonable doesn't it...... but no children over Easter, this would be my normal weekend for having kids....... i kind of already know the answer.... her compromise will be that the kids are getting to spend more time with me over Easter (which is good)....... its just frustrating that i'll now have to tell kids they're going back to their mums at end of week instead of coast...... final order is going to have everything battened down as much as possible..... it seems trusting and building bridges=gullible fool....
I need to step back and put some proper perspective on it.... too het up.
Thanks Mojo, have a good Easter.
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