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[Solved] Confused now

 
(@Gareth1972)
Trusted Member Registered

Spent some time today with my ex's 21 year old son, brother of my little one.

Explained about having gone to mediation and handing papers into court about seeing her. He thinks I'm silly and could make things worse by alienating his mum even more.

He did make sense with what he was saying, and in part I agree with him. (I do know the way his mums mind works and how stubborn she can be).

He thinks I should just sit back and let time take it's course, obviously that could be years and I can't wait for ever. But don't want to make things any more difficult.

Head battered now.

Quote
Topic starter Posted : 11/06/2015 2:44 am
 1626
(@1626)
Noble Member Registered

Sorry to hear you're going through this. It's understandable to be confused about the situation, unfortunately only you can make the decision whether to go ahead with proceedings. Court can be a very difficult time for all involved and things can often get worse before they get better and an order put in place.

It's not silly to establish contact with your child and I'm sure court has to be a last resort for you when mediation hasn't worked, obviously I don't know your ex's son and their relationship but is it possible he's slightly biased or been asked to offer opinions to sway your decision?

Keep posting and I'm sure everyone here will give you plenty of support.
It's also worth thinking about attending a Families Need Fathers group meeting where you can get face to face support from other parents in your position. Here's a link to the list of meetings. Good luck

http://www.fnf.org.uk/help-and-support-2/local-branch-meetings

ReplyQuote
Posted : 11/06/2015 10:15 am
(@got-the-tshirt)
Famed Member Registered

Hi There,

As said it is difficult, if you've been through mediation and that didn't work then court is the next step, I understand what you ex's son is saying but as already said is he helping her out? may not be of course only you know him (and your ex) it is easy to say I won't do this becuase the reaction would be worse, but you can't always work that way or you won't get very far.

If you think about it your ex isn't thinking that way, is isn't worried about causing issues by her actions which is why you are where you are now.

You need to think about things and talk through how you feel here and we can advise further.

GTTS

ReplyQuote
Posted : 11/06/2015 12:51 pm
(@dadmod4)
Illustrious Member

As a matter of interest, what were your ex's son's thoughts on the situation regarding contact - could he talk to his mum regarding some way forwards?

ReplyQuote
Posted : 14/06/2015 7:26 pm
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