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Hi All
I am new to the site but had a look at a few of the Forum's and looks like a great website. I wondered if anyone could give me some solid advice on my situation please as I could do with getting an idea of where I stand legally before going to find a Solicitor. My Ex and I split about a year ago after I found out she was having an affair but we have only just managed to sell the house, proceeding now. We have a 7 year old Son but are not married. I have always been very much a hands on Dad and to be honest have probably done a bit more than she has over the years. Since the split I have had my little boy 3 nights a week and every other weekend. I take him to school every single day and have done the whole time he has been there. The advice I need is as follows. 1. I will want to continue to have my boy for at least 50/50 or as it has been 3 nights and every other weekend. My question is where do I stand legally if she wants to fight that, am I within my rights as a Father to have that. 2. If that is possible is it correct that I am not entitled to pay her Child Maintenance should I wish so seeing as it is at least 50/50 , I probably would still pay something and I would continue to pay for all his clothes, shoes, school uniform etc as I have pretty much always done. 3. Would I need to get a legal document drawn up so that she couldn't change anything decided regards questions 1 & 2.
4. If she became difficult and tried to make the sale of the house a problem (she would obviously have to sign to sell as its in joint names) what route do I take to enforce that.
Any help on these questions and how it would stand up Legally if it should go that far would be greatly appreciated.
Thanks
J
Hi there
I'm assuming she is claiming the child benefit? If this is the case, she is highly likely to be considered as the primary carer. If she were to go to the CMS (Child Maintenance Service) that would be all they would need to come to that conclusion. They do make reductions for every overnight a child spends with the paying parent. Having said that, if you can prove that you have the children at leas 50% of the time you shouldn't have to pay any maintenance...but it's very difficult to get them to agree! They may accept a court order, if it stipulates that you both share care equally.
If she realises that she would lose entitlement to maintenance, she could reduceyour overnights to take you below the 50% threshold. Without a court order in place, she can do this very easily.
As far as I'm aware, it isn't posssible to have a legal document drawn up that would stand up, although if she breached such an agreement and you took it to court, they may take it into account. A Child Arrangements Order obtained in the family court is legally binding.
Because it's her home too, she could refuse to sign and there are things she can do to try and remain in the house, because there's a child she might get permission to stay in the house....this isn't an area I know a great deal about and as there's a lot at stake I advise that you seek proper legal advice about where you stand and what she can do to stay in the property. Is the mortgage in joint names? Has she given any indication that she wishes to stay?
All the best
Hi there thank you for getting back to me with your advice. I think I will get a Solicitor to look over the few points to be safe, it seems to me though that there can be different answers depending on who you go to and no one unified answer. No I don't believe she should have any reason not to leave the house.
Cheers
The Citizens Advice Bureau should be able to give you advice and some solicitors offer a free initial consultation which might be useful. Here's some info I found
Good luck
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