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My son has put in to have contact with his son through a child arrangements order. He has a long criminal history sheet which stopped 6 years ago when he moved area and turned his life around.However after extreme provocation both times he threw his ex partners phone and it smashed and also caused damage to her car recently. Police have arrested her on many occasions for assaulting him but never charged her SS are involved and put safeguarding in place that they cannot be together. In an up to date safety plan it states that my son must not interact with his ex partner, must not let her in his home and to call the police when she turns up with their son. They have also said that what is working well is that he has put in this child arrangements order. Will the judge most likely take one look at his record and deny access. Any information would be appreciated please
I'm no expert - But I'll be very surprised if a judge totally refuses to grant access
I think because of the circumstances the judge is likely to offer supervised contact
hi,
because of his criminal record, it sounds like court process will be a big pain in the back side. he can expect to be told things like he would need to see children in a contact centre. if he is seeing his children already at home etc and ex not stopping that, then that could go in his favour and that could be seen that the children are safe with him.
How old is the child your son is trying to get contact to see? Criminal record he has will be seen in family court as historic.
Social services would get involved if it goes to family court rather than cafcass possibly
My grandson is 2 . SS are already involved as we alerted them to issues over 18 months ago . The mother has to live at her parents as they are the protective factors ( supposedly ). However the mother turns up at my sons steaming drunk ,driving the car with my grandson in. We phone the police but they say they have to catch her driving . We have phone recordings to prove her drunk , controlling and abusive behaviour but the new social worker doesn't want to know and won't listen saying they are irelevent. We haven't a clue what we are allowed to disclose at the court hearings to defend himself as she has made out that he is the one doing the harrassing.My son has at least 10 neighbours in the street and area who would be witnesses at court . He has lots of crime reference numbers , and facebook logs of hundreds of missed calls from her. Can any of these be used or shown . Any help would be appreciated. He has no representation and I know he is going to struggle in court . I am trying to forward think and get a file made up for him .
If social services are involved is 2 year old son on a child protection plan or a child in need plan?
What you need to do as hard as it seems is to not make any more allegation about childs mum or grandma as at the moment it seems to be classed as
mudslinging. What will happen is eventually they will get caught out themselves doing things they shouldn't be doing. at moment it could see you both seen in wrong light by social services etc. if social services already involved they may attend court instead of cafcass and be responsible for doing reports.
Because child is 2 everyone including family court will have to act with caution when recommending contact and its likely to be phased/built up.
Under no circumstances should either of you react to social services , they will constantly test you /press your buttons..its all about playing the long game. as soon as you talk about your 2 year old only and say nothing bad about ex you will get access pretty quick and believe it or not the way your ex is going off the rails social services could even see you both having full custody of son/daughter if mum carries on the way she is.
whats most important now is working alongside social services and building contact up fast and showing them that your 2 year old isn't going to witness hostility and mum been rundown. its a mistake a lot of dads make in court is to be focused on proofing what mum has done wrong with all kinds of evidence and more often than not rulings can go against you..
My son has at least 10 neighbours in the street and area who would be witnesses at court . He has lots of crime reference numbers , and facebook logs of hundreds of missed calls from her. Can any of these be used or shown
the above I would only say I am able to produce crime reference numbers about fallouts with ex and I have facebook logs of missed calls if needed. I am only here today in family court to be able to be a dad to our young child. the latest incident was a ONE OFF as I have kept out of trouble for many years. I have now had time to reflect and now want to focus on securing regular contact with our son , to work with any professionals involved and to be able to co-parent etc..
don't under any circumstances offer to do any domestic violence courses if offered as your argument will be you accept relationship is over and its a one off incident and wont happen again. best way to put off people recommending that course is to be calm /child focused and only talk about child and say nothing negative about ex whatsoever.. let the professionals find out themselves without your input. lastly don't have anything to do with your ex whatsoever as it could lead to you getting wound up again, get your mum to arrange contact or childs social worker ( any 3rd party)
Can I PM you please
Thankyou for all that information warwickshire. It will be very helpful to my son. He would not know where to start. Contact cannot be arranged via me or any of our family as my grandson has never been allowed to meet any of his paternal family. He has a brother, sister, cousins, grandparents and great grandparents and never met any of them. Before my son put this order in. He could only see his son with her and one of the conditions were that he couldnt see any of his family so we had to meet in secret. When he wasnt with her he would have to be at home and prove it by making the door squeak or the dog bark and send videos of himself at home. Im glad he has finally found the strength to file this order. Hopefully he will get some kind of contact without having to deal with all the abuse.
sorry been out all day and evening. if you would like to PM me that is fine
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