Welcome to the DAD.Info forum: Important Information – open to read:
Our forum aims to provide support and guidance where it can, however we may not always have the answer. The forum is not moderated 24 hours a day, so If you – or someone you know – are being harmed or in immediate danger of being harmed, call the police on 999.
Alternatively, if you are in crisis, please call Samaritans on 116 123.
If you are worried about you or someone you know is at risk of harm, please click here: How we can help
Well today I had my safeguarding report phone all.
First off the lady had not even spoke to my ex partner before speaking to me which I found very strange.
I tried to keep everything on and even keel and not bad mouth her.
Few bits I had to say which I felt the lady needed to know and then the one question I didn’t want her asking because I knew full well I’d instantly reply with the truth...
Has the mother had any boyfriends!!!
I tried as much as I could to be polically correct in my response (she’s had a few) I said and then tried to change the subject.
All in all I feel the call was ok but obviously when I revive the report il know full well what she thinks.
I felt the lady only wanted to know the last 12 month but I said to her I’d like to explain from when we first split up as she would get a full picture on how I’ve brought our child up since he was 1 and how his mother only wanted to know when myself and current partner fell pregnant with our first child.
She asked the usualany concerns with anything can you both talk about school health.
I did tell her that when Jc picked our son up a few times he’s been coming out with things like
My mummy said I’m going to live with her
My mummy said I don’t ha e to share my toys
My mummy says only mummy and daddy can tell me off.
Our child’s 4 so I feel he’s obviously having this drummed into his head parentle alienation springs to mind! Obviously I didn’t say to Cafcass that I think it’s that.
I’m really hoping Cafcass are not as bad as I’ve been reading up on.
To be fair, Schedule 2 Safeguarding letters are usually pretty neutral and present the facts as each parent have disclosed. The ones you generally read about tend to be at the extreme end of the spectrum.
Just sit tight, see what it says when it arrives and you can comment about your view of it's content in your position statement that you take to the first hearing. Nothing will happen quickly in a case like this. Your most likely recommended outcome is a Section 7 Welfare Report which takes a few months to carry out.
I’ve not been asked for a position statement yet as it’s first hearing.
I have how ever been working on one just in case though.
This is just a variation that she wants all about money in all honesty. She would like me to sign child benefit and tax credits o we to her. But I’ve refused atm because I have other children in the house and don’t want to risk putting us under stress of waiting for new claim to be processed. I ha e however offered to sign this over to her when they do our annual review as that way they won’t stop our claim as they told me on the phone.
You don't need to be asked for a position statement, but it is recommended you take one with you so the court understand what your position is. It is very easy to get tongue tied and side tracked once you're in there, and a PS can really help.
You want something about 2 pages, 1.5 line spaced, size 12 font. A very brief and factual outline of the background, what has led to the application and what you are asking the court to do.
The court will probably order a Section 7 Report and for both parties to provide a longer witness statement / statement of evidence in due course.
The court will not deal with finances in a children's hearing & who receives what benefit is out of their jurisdiction anyway.
Welcome to the DAD.info forum.
We don’t like to set ‘rules’, but to make sure that you and the other dads are kept safe, we have some requests. When engaging with the forum, please be aware of the following:
- The forum is not moderated 24 hours per day.
- Many of the moderators do so on a voluntary basis. Whilst they may be able to provide some guidance, advice or support, they may not be able to deal with specifics.
- We are not an emergency crisis service so if you or someone else is in immediate danger, please call emergency services.
- If you are concerned about the safety of a child, please click here to find the support you can get for them (link to new page)
- If you are in crisis, please call Samaritans on 116 123. They are open 24 hours a day, 7 days per week.
We hope you find this forum a supportive environment and thank you for joining us.