[Solved] Cafcas telephone interview

Hi

Trying to tell Cafcass everything at this stage, and denigrating the mother, probably won't do much good. I

t's not that Cafcass are generally biased, but more that at this stage, they are just trying to get an idea of both parties positions and any concerns they may have.

At present, your biggest concern is that your son is being denied a meaningful relationship with you (unless there are serious safeguarding concerns you feel the need to raise).

If Children's Services have had any involvement with your child, Cafcass will already know about this as they run checks on the PNC and CS system.

At this stage, my advice would be to answer what is asked of you and be clear about what you are asking the court to do.

Cafcass will produce a brief letter of recommendation to the court and depending on what you both say about the other. If they feel there are more serious issues afoot, they can recommend further involvement.

If you are using your solicitor for the hearing, they will know how to guide you on all these matters.

Good luck

Hi thanks for your reply. Yes my biggest concern now is that my son hasnt seen me for what must seem like a very long time to him and obviously me. I know she will be making allegations about me as she has made that clear unless she has a sudden change of heart.
I also have issues but like you say right now i don't want anything to prolong my son getting to see his dad for any longer.
What kind of questions do they ask during these phone interviews? Thanks.

I too am in a similar situation. I feel that the truth about my ex partner should be raised and have been told not to say anything bad about her to cafcass. Some of these are safeguarding issues which can be proven but have never been made official. I think this is a very important issue and would like to hear more from people who have been through this.

Whilst most of the "problems" with my ex are historical there is a clear and repeated pattern of behaviour that I think should be addressed by the courts. If raising these issues to cafcass are just going to make me look bad then where do I (or you) stand?

They are likely to ask your view on why you separated, what the arrangements have been, why you think they have broken down, and what you would like the court to do.

If they speak to the mother first which quite often happens, if she raises any concerns, they might ask you to give your view of those.

It's a very simple call and usually over quickly.

Thanks for the input as I had little idea of what to expect. My solicitor told me that I best had mention my concerns. His reasoning was that if I was to say nothing and something happened to my son as a result of issues i am aware of then I could actually get myself in trouble by not mentioning something which I believed may place him in harms way. To the point where I had him taken away from me.
To me though the whole point is not who might get in trouble or anything but about the welfare of my son. It seems wholly ludicrous that a father with genuine concerns should be deemed a trouble causer or looking to get one over on someone by mentioning these concerns. But that seems to be the consensus which then leaves an agonising dilemma.
I can only be open and honest, follow their guidance and tell them everything I know about what I'm asked. I just hope they see everything for what it is.

What did you write on the c100? Weren't the issues you have raised then?

Absolutely the number one priority must be the children's safety. How that can be turned against you as if you're trying to cause trouble is just nuts. Surely cafcass can see this?

I hope they can. I was advised to keep my c100 brief and to the point. I just stated that i was getting no contact whatsoever with my son and that I wanted the courts help to reinstate it. I know she is going to be suggesting allsorts of welfare issues but if they do their job correctly cafcas will see these issues for what they.

I have a court date but in the meantime I'm not seeing him don't know where he is and am getting no response from her when I ask how he is. It's all so wrong and I feel completely devastated. I had considered ringing 101 but I doubt they would be interested or whether they could do anything.

Hi there

I don't think it would be a good idea to call 101 at this point, you have a date for the hearing and although it's hard, it's better to let things take their course.

If you have concerns, of course you should raise them, but be calm and reasoned about it, it's likely they will have spoken to your ex before they talk to you and therefore it's likely they will be aware of the strained relationship between you both. It might help if you pick one or two of what you think are your biggest concerns and write down what you want to say about them.

At the same time, you can express the wish that in the future you hope that as parents, you can both put the past behind you and be the best parents you can be and work together in your child's best interests. If you think she's been a good mother, aside from your concerns, you can say that too...it helps to give some balance.

All the best

Thanks. I have good days but more bad at the moment. It's all wrong but I'll deal with it as best I can. I had so many concerns that it's going to be difficult to focus on the positives of which there weren't many. But all it will do is make me look like someone I'm not if I keep going on about them. I'll focus on the few main issues as they are serious concerns. Of course in the future i want us to be able to be civil but right now all I feel is sadness, anger and hatred unfortunately, how else could i feel having had someone deny me the right to see my child for no good reason at all. I can see how this ordeal makes people very Ill.

Hi Sad_dad,

Not much advice just encouragement mate.

I remember very well your feelings about 'the other parent' who is meant to be looking out for the best interests and well being of your son.

Its hard not to think like that about them at times..... as difficult as it can be keep looking after yourself in the mean time as these issues usually go on for a bit longer than people realise, It's emotionally and mentally taxing so get yourself in a good routine now and set yourself up. There's a good bit about quickly reducing anxiety in the home section with a little video, learning and practicing these little things surprisingly does help.

Hope you get to see your son again soon.

All the Best