Welcome to the DAD.Info forum: Important Information – open to read:
Our forum aims to provide support and guidance where it can, however we may not always have the answer. The forum is not moderated 24 hours a day, so If you – or someone you know – are being harmed or in immediate danger of being harmed, call the police on 999.
Alternatively, if you are in crisis, please call Samaritans on 116 123.
If you are worried about you or someone you know is at risk of harm, please click here: How we can help
Hi all,
I was just looking for some advice about an issue..
After over a year of fighting I've finally managed to meet my son's childminder, after a few visits I asked if it would be ok if I picked him up at 4 instead of 4.30 when I can as I sometimes can leave early. The childminder was fine with this.
Unfortunately my ex was not 'as the order says 3 hours' she wants me to bring him back earlier. I have throughout been accomodating doing collections and drops of in the week 30 minutes each way, and changing the weekend time because it suited her
She has been calling the police and says I'm in breach where in reality I'm just trying to maximize my time that has no I'll effects for her.
Should I
A) just give up collect him at 4.30 and wait if I'm early
B) do nothing collect when I want and see what she does
C) go back to court specific issue order or for an amendment
D) fully revert to original order ask her to collect and change the weekend time
I appreciate it's not a lot of time and can't see her problem apart from she is trying to control everything
Thanks all
Hi there
Might it be worth writing her a letter to point out that courts would expect some flexibility and for parents to work together when changes are appropriate. Explain that you have always tried to be accommodating and that you have previously agreed to changes to the original order to her benefit, and this should work both ways.
Further explain that you have taken advice and if she can’t work with you on this, you feel that you have no choice but to initiate mediation, and if that failed, to make a fresh application to court to ask for an increased schedule of contact.
You would need to attempt mediation before you can make another application.
All the best
Welcome to the DAD.info forum.
We don’t like to set ‘rules’, but to make sure that you and the other dads are kept safe, we have some requests. When engaging with the forum, please be aware of the following:
- The forum is not moderated 24 hours per day.
- Many of the moderators do so on a voluntary basis. Whilst they may be able to provide some guidance, advice or support, they may not be able to deal with specifics.
- We are not an emergency crisis service so if you or someone else is in immediate danger, please call emergency services.
- If you are concerned about the safety of a child, please click here to find the support you can get for them (link to new page)
- If you are in crisis, please call Samaritans on 116 123. They are open 24 hours a day, 7 days per week.
We hope you find this forum a supportive environment and thank you for joining us.