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Hi to all, I'm very happy to find this place. I've not seen my daughter for 3 months now. I was told to leave family home just before Christmas, and since I've gone and my ex wife knows I don't want to be with her at all, she has done everything she can to stop me seeing her. She is very high conflict and insisted on my daughter seeing me once a fortnight for an hour for dinner at my expense, and strictly with her being there at all times. Since she has realised I will never return to her life, she has stopped me seeing my 11yr old completely. She thinks if I don't want her, I can't have my daughter in my life. She has history with this behaviour with an ex husband who wrote to his son, and she destroyed the letters before he could see them. I am willing to do mediation, but are unsure how to approach this in writing, as she lies to all about my behaviour, and will do anything to use my daughter as a pawn against me. Even to the point we cannot do a clean break as my daughter is used as ransom, for financial blackmail. My priority now, is just to have a relationship with my daughter who has just started high school. I've been to a solicitor, spent £££ and got little, only a quote of £3-13k to take the matter to court. Money I will never have. Any advice very gratefully received. Many thanks.
Hi you need to get this to court . You can self represent , lots of stuff on here online , Youtibe etc . If you choose to be represented get a direct access barrister . I learned the hard expensive way using solicitors . Waste of time and money . Google direct access portal and find a barrister that way .
To apply to court you have to attempt mediation 1st . If like my ex yours won’t attend the mediator signs the form that says it’s failed and you can go to court . Also don’t pay the Ex a penny you don’t have to . Once she realises it won’t work she’ll realise the kids Isn’t a weapon
Contact a mediator . Tell them you give your ex a week to respond to them and book a date for the MAIM ,which is a session you both do separately to discuss what mediation is , what the issue are etc and if the ex hasn’t responded you want them to sign the form to let you apply to court . Make sure you don’t send the Ex any crappy emails etc don’t give them any excuse to question your behaviour in a court etc . Don’t Turn up at the house un announced etc and keep all emails as a record so she can’t dispute any plans etc. .you think that people Argue but there’s no Malice but In these situations exes make up all sorts . Mine certainly made false reports to police and social services . No judgment on your Ex but it does happen .self representing at court is very do able and I was more than prepared to do so but I found a direct access barrister to represent me and do the position statement for £500, one thing they do is before the hearing there are pre chats . My ex wont negotiate with me but might with the barrister . Don’t do what I did and hope it will blow over and get better .. 2 years later it hasn’t hence I’ll be in court soon enough ...
Unfortunately, this will have to go to court if your ex is messing you about. You will have to attempt medication, If she refuses to attend, they will provide you with a certificate that can be submitted with the C100 form to the courts.
The quicker you do this, the better, as it can be months until the the first court hearing which obviously stops you seeing your daughter.
It is so frustrating that women have all of the power, I have not seen mine for nearly 8 months now. I will be seeing them next weekend though, and a third and final hearing is taking place mid December. Any questions, then please feel free to ask. i went unrepresented, the second hearing was a bit a [censored] to be honest, so I have paid for a solicitor for the third and final one.
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