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Hi can I ask for advice please,
I have had regular contact with my daughter for the last 6 years and have her every weekend with one stay over weekend plus when her mother needs me to have her to help and on the surface things seem fine and formal things have been avoided.
Of late the ex cancels access when it seems to suit her and I can only imagine this is because she has a new partner and I honestly don't have a problem with this her life is her own. My worry is that I don't have a formal agreement and wonder if it's best I get this done and what to ask for holidays Christmas etc I just want some clarity but also want things to be fair there is no talking to the ex about this as she won't the present situation suits her as she dictates. How do I go about getting a formal agreement and am I entitled to one as there is no conflict as such just my insecurities any advice of how I go about this would be great thanks
Steve
The only wa to get an agreement that is binding is by court order and to be honest I don’t think your situation would warrant such an action. I can absolutely understand your need for clarity and the difficulty you have in getting your ex to discuss it.
What might be useful is a couple of sessions of mediation, this is often used to get some proper agreement in place and ant agreements reached can be written into a Memorandum of Understanding, which whilst not legal binding, is a formal document of intent.
As you already have a good, regular schedule of contact in place, you may not be successful with a court application, as they do expect parents to be flexible with contact issues and sort arrangements out between themselves. As part of the application process you would need to attempt mediation in the first instance anyway.
In general, a contact order would see special occasions such as Christmas and birthdays shared alternately, year upon year and school holidays shared.
All the best
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