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Hello everyone.
I've got a 6yo and there's an issue that constantly bugs me.
She is really interested in willy's and private parts. More male then female but in general.
There's been a few occasions when we've caught her trying to look at a friends willy or a female friends private parts.
I understand kids are curious and the teacher caught her once and had a word with her bur is this normal?
I stopped having baths with her a long time ago when I started to notice this. Today she came home with notes from a boy saying ill show my willy to you if you show yours to me. I understand there 6yo kids and its not in a sexual way but it's hard to deal with it without snapping at her.
The kids all this happend with are all innocent kids away in land of fairy's but it still really frustrates me.
I've been looking online and aparntly it is normal to a degree but it's just dealing with it.
Does anyone else's kids do this atall
Hi,
I have kids aged 8,5 and 3 and I would find that behavior very odd. Most probably there is bad influence from other kids in school. You could raise concerns at school. Is this a child you have with your ex partner?
@bill337 thanks for the reply no she's me snd my partners daughter full time. It happend again tonight we are going to bring it up with the school tomorow it does worry me mentioning something of that nature to a school. Do you know what will happen ?
There are a couple of videos on U tube that might be helpful. 'My private parts belong to me' and 'talk pants' with a pants song and my body belongs to me. I guess its meant for dealing with inappropriate adult behaviour but you might be able to use it
I agree that talking to the school is a good plan. They should know how to deal with it and it's unlikely not to have happened before. They can advise you what to say at home
Hello Lostinblac,
Thank you for sharing your concerns and feelings about your daughters curiosity in the human body. Before going any further I would like to suggest that a child who shows interest in the human body - it is not shameful or rude, but I would suggest that how it is managed and talked about is important. I hope the following suggestions help in some way:
1. I would strongly suggest that you set up an appointment with the school and if you still have the note that your daughters school friend wrote to her, show this to the teacher and relay your concerns to them. It maybe that at 6 years old the other child in question does not fully understand the implications of what they are asking, but it would be good to share how as a parent it is making you feel. Children are curious about their bodies, but it has to be looked at in a respectful way.
2. There are some great books that you can get to sit down with your daughter and talk about the body, learning healthy boundaries and that will help you as parents to talk about it calmly and safely. Here are a few to begin with: "The Girls Body Book", "Amazing You!" (which looks at boys and girls), "Lift and Flap Questions about the Body". These can all be found on Amazon.
3. Try your very best not to tell your daughter off for what she says about the situation - she is curious and wants to know how and why our bodies are different.
4. Are you able to talk with your partner about why you find it frustrating and irritating when you see/hear your daughter acting like this? Keep communication going and talk about how you are feeling - it's ok to wonder why.
5. Have an informal, relaxed chat with your daughter when Mum is there too and gently say to her which areas of our bodies are just for us to look at and look after. You could encourage this behaviour in school too, and encourage her next time to give any letters or to report anything that is said to her about certain body parts that is inappropriate.
I appreciate that it is not easy when situations like this arise, but if you are open and honest with your daughter and try to keep calm, you will do fine.
Best wishes, Fegans Parent Support
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