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Hello people. I'm new, so excuse any faux pas.
I share care 50/50 exactly with a midweek split (at ex insistence) my son is 13 and growing! Ex has discontinued the splitting of benefits and clearly sees it as separate to what's needed to raise, feed, clothe the boy. Ex insists on a uniform at each house. Bike. PlayStation. Everything.. Essentially doubling instead of halving costs.
However. Ex has stopped paying me 50% of boys child Ben/CH tax creds, which i use for all of the above and more. Bus fares to school and back..dinner money..clothes..shoes he will grow out of so fast. Nothing from him for a yqear. And one payment in March. I currently have no work and waiting between last part time job money and income support claim to come into payment. I've used a food bank and had to borrow money just to get electric, food and essentials. Ex has put us into poverty and there seems to be no protection against this. My son, nor myself cannot countenance 100% care with ex. But the poor lad deserves so much better. Any advice?
I presume that since it's a 50/50 split, you aren't paying her child maintenance. The unfortunate fact is that child benefit can only be paid to one parent, and they won't split this between two parents. I can't see that there is anything you can do to force her to pay you anything, so I would say that, for the moment, all you can do is to stop buying anything for him that isn't absolutely essential - he doesn't have to have everything at both houses for the moment. I'm afraid I can't give you any better advice than this.
The only way around it is if your son spends a further one night with you, that would mean he lives with you more of the time and you could then claim the benefits directly.
At 13 your sons wishes would carry weight and if that was amenable to him, it may solve the problem, you could then share it with her and show her how it should be done!
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