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Hi I don't if anyone can help me with some advice
In sort nasty break up 3 and half year ago Constant battle to see my daughter been to mediation three times Each time we get an arrangement made for access to my daughter with my ex and then breaking
I have a constant battle every single month to see my daughter my ex does everything in her power to try and stop me from seeing her
For my daughters 14 birthday I asked her what she would like to do she told me she would like to go away for three days that we already had arranged a year ago and take me with you wanted to do on this day this trip has been arranged for months and she knows that she's been looking forward to going
Three weeks ago I had an email from my ex to say she was thinking of taking my daughter away to see Justin Bieber over the half term break and that It might clash with my visitation rights but informed me that I must not ruin our daughters birthday surprise and that she would charge me if she had to cancel the plans if I kicked off .(I have never kicked off that's what she does) I informed my eggs actually we had plans and that those plans have been paid for and that my daughter had asked for this to happen . I then received another email stating that she was going away with my daughter and that I would miss out on some of my contacts and note again to kick off about this . I gain emailed her politely I came up with a compromise which didn't mean because had to change our plans that we could work it out so that my daughter could spend have to have the day with her mother seeing Justin Bieber the other half with myself away as planned my ex agreed to the changes made ( which was out of character )
I then got a phone call from my daughter just before she headed off on her trip with her mother to state that she did not want to see me this half term as she wanted to spend some time at home with her friends I explain to her that this should been planned for months she knew about it and that we had spent a lot of money I turn it for her for her birthday I had a very rude child responding to me that I had to grow up it was her choice and that I had no say in the matter (does not sound like my child's words) I polite they emailed my ex asking her to please explain to my daughter that this trip is been planned I had been paid for and that she could not cancel like that .
The response I got was that I daughter had made the decision that she only wants to go away wants to add the holiday and that I should respect that decision and that I would not be seeing her and not try to contact her with all my ex as they would not open or respond to any emails phone calls oh taxes as they wanted to enjoy their week away I was then told I would have no contact at all with my daughter until my next visitation weekend .
Can anyone please give some advice of where I stand what I should do about this situation I am devastated that I am not see my daughter for her birthday as previously arranged I am devastated that thought of my daughter talking to me that way I am also upset about the fact I have spent a lot of money on a special few days away for my daughter which I know will not be happening I have already contacted mediation about starting the process again but I know that my daughter is 14 is probably even less chance of me getting time to see her especially with the way her mother does everything she can to stop me and to alienate me from her
Hi there
Without an actual court order you don't have any say in this unfortunately and the mother can do more or less what she likes.
If your daughters rude behaviour is out of character, I would suggest that it's her mothers influence and no doubt the mother has bribed your daughter with holidays and Justin Bieber concerts. At 14 your daughter is still a child and can be manipulated quite easily with gifts etc.
I think,the only option you have is to apply to the court for a Child Arrangements Order, the fact that your daughter is 14 means that her wishes and feelings will carry a lot of weight in what the court decide, but at least you will have tried.
If you contact the mediator and explain that you have used mediation previously, that all agreements reached are never adhered to and you feel that more mediation would be equally ineffective, they should agree to sign of the C100 form to enable you to apply to,court.
There's lots of information about the process in the stickys at the top of the legal eagle section which you may find useful. Many members choose to self represent and if you decide to go down this route,we will do our best to support you.
All the best
Thank you for you advice exactly what I thought financially I have no money to pay for solicitors to go to court if I did represent myself do you know roughly how much that would cost Iike I said I literally have no money it took 3 1/2 years to finally get divorced because she messed me around so much that when I finally got to pay out all that money was already taken full in the debts that I've built up for the solicitors .
Also I had to pay for mediation she didn't she got legally would she get legal aid for going to court because if that's the case she will drag on and on and on Thanks
Thank you for you advice exactly what I thought financially I have no money to pay for solicitors to go to court if I did represent myself do you know roughly how much that would cost Iike I said I literally have no money it took 3 1/2 years to finally get divorced because she messed me around so much that when I finally got to pay out all that money was already taken full in the debts that I've built up for the solicitors .
Also I had to pay for mediation she didn't she got legally would she get legal aid for going to court because if that's the case she will drag on and on and on Thanks
If she is in receipt of benefits she may still qualify for legal aid funding for mediation, but this does not cover legal representation in court.
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