Welcome to the DAD.Info forum: Important Information – open to read:
Our forum aims to provide support and guidance where it can, however we may not always have the answer. The forum is not moderated 24 hours a day, so If you – or someone you know – are being harmed or in immediate danger of being harmed, call the police on 999.
Alternatively, if you are in crisis, please call Samaritans on 116 123.
If you are worried about you or someone you know is at risk of harm, please click here: How we can help
Hi.
I am contacting you on behalf of my friend who is in a relationship with a woman who has a lovely 5 year old daughter.
To keep things short - The daughter was due to be dropped off by her dad at 2:30pm
Her mum and my friend were in town and had left loads of time to get back to the house
The dad called up and got quite irate over the phone, suggesting they'd be home too late to receive his daughter.
They reassured him that they'd be back in time - and they were.
He called to say that he'd taken her to the park.
When he finally dropped her off she stank of weed.
He got rather rude, saying that his daughters mum had issues and needed to "get her head looked at".
My friend questioned him about it - out of ear shot of their daughter.
The conversation didn't go too well - just raised voices - but he was asked to leave.
Obviously I know that I only see one side. I also know that things aren't always going to be smooth sailing, but my main concern is the daughters welfare with someone who is smoking weed around her.
The mum does not want to withdraw contact and still wants her daughter to see her dad....but what should they do in this instance?
There's no right or wrong way to approach this. I would suggest that the mother puts in writing to the father that if this occurs again, she will have no other choice than to consider stopping contact or that contact will have to become supervised.
If he won't agree or things deteriorate, she can try attending mediation with him to come up with a plan together. If that fails, she could make an application to the court.
Hopefully, something formal in writing should be enough to stop him smoking cannabis when the child is in his care.
The mother should talk to her husband about this matter. If her husband is smoking weed then she should warn him. She can file a petition in court to reduce visiting hours or even disallow him to meet with her daughter. You should take online relationship counseling as it's not safe for your daughter.
I’ve removed your link, little point as your based over the pond! Family law in the UK is different to that in US and Canada.
[censored], I also have a 5-year-old daughter, at first I thought that someone was complaining about me. I honestly can't imagine a situation where a child smelled like grass. We have fish at home and often this food stinks of grass, as if someone smoked at home. And maybe the father himself uses, but there are also medicinal herbs, cannabis, which is prescribed to many people to reduce pain symptoms or other ailments. It might just be a coincidence, but look what the law says. Perhaps my father leads a difficult life and is engaged in something illegal, although in my country such things are sold freely and even prescribed by a doctor.
Welcome to the DAD.info forum.
We don’t like to set ‘rules’, but to make sure that you and the other dads are kept safe, we have some requests. When engaging with the forum, please be aware of the following:
- The forum is not moderated 24 hours per day.
- Many of the moderators do so on a voluntary basis. Whilst they may be able to provide some guidance, advice or support, they may not be able to deal with specifics.
- We are not an emergency crisis service so if you or someone else is in immediate danger, please call emergency services.
- If you are concerned about the safety of a child, please click here to find the support you can get for them (link to new page)
- If you are in crisis, please call Samaritans on 116 123. They are open 24 hours a day, 7 days per week.
We hope you find this forum a supportive environment and thank you for joining us.