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Hello Everyone… I am a mom, but signed up for this forum, because I would like to hear opinions from men as opposed to women who would bad-talk all men because they had some issues with some. I’d like to hear real opinions.
I am usually pretty good at solving my own issues and I am not a whiner…. Usually I am the one who is helping others, but this time I am puzzled myself.
I have a husband and we have a toddler son; I am a very happy mother, but not happily married. My issue is that I feel I am taken for granted, and whatever I do is not appreciated (simple things like keeping his clothing on hangers after I would iron them, or after I clean the house try not to make a mess, etc.). My husband does not make me feel pretty (he has weird comments sometimes about my appearance). He would talk to me sometimes very rude when I ask him something…. (For instance… we agreed on going to a store but he is driving the opposite direction. Then I would ask, did not we want to go that place, how come you are driving this way… I think it is legitimate to ask, He would answer in a rude tone… “just so you have something to ask”.) He is usually happy when I go out for a walk at night, so he can watch his shows uninterrupted. He is dealing with obesity and I try my best to cook in a way that supports his diet (very tough task to accomplish day after day), and try to remind him on drinking fluids, etc. But he takes it as an offense and tells me to leave him alone with my stupid nagging. I do not feel loved or desired at all and not sure what to do. I know I am not perfect either as none of us is… I have already tried to talk about it… he would say “whatever” or just get offended and not talk to me at all…I do not say that everything he does is bad, I just listed things that make me feel this way, so you understand. These things overweigh the good things I could list , though. I do not think I expect too much, but maybe I do… what do you all think.? Please let me know… I would really appreciate it.
Hi and welcome to the forum.
That's a tricky one. It does sound rather one-sided. Perhaps it might be worth broaching the subject of going to see Relate, or something similar, because if it continues the way it's going, then the marriage isn't going to last, and at the moment it's at the stage where perhaps it can be saved. I think the question he needs to be asked (and perhaps you too) is what exactly is he getting out of the marriage?
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