Thanks for joining us on the forum – glad to have you here. You are welcome to post 24/7 but please note that whilst we have forum moderators we will only be moderating the forum during office hours. If though you need urgent crisis help, please contact Samaritans on 116 123.
Spurgeons and Dad.Info doesn’t investigate reports of abuse or neglect. But below, you can find advice on who to contact if you have concerns about a child or young person.
Reporting a concern
It can be difficult to know what to do if you think a child is at risk. It’s important to remember that if you’ve spotted things that don’t seem right, others will have too. Speaking up can make sure that child gets help as soon as possible.
The sooner you contact your local children’s social care duty team, the quicker they can act. They’re available 24 hours a day, and can make an anonymous report if that feels safer. If a child is in immediate danger, please call the police straight away by dialling 999.
Report child abuse or neglect to your local council
Use these links to get in touch with your local council:
My wife asked me to move out with no exceptions. im 24 and been married for going on 5 years. We have 2 boys aged 4 & 1. She wanted to separate because things dont work between us anymore. I work shifts at very unsociable times ranging from starting 4.30am in the morning to finishing at 1am constantly flipping from early middles and lates so that is a struggle in its self. My wife states a big reason is because i dont help much with the kids but i do everything she asks i understand she needs a break too. I pay all the bills but she claims i dont but doesn't have any proof to back up the claim but still insists it. I'm at my wits end there is no compromise. She has showed no emotions intimacy or interest in our relationship for about 2years i have tried hard to get her to make her feel loved but no results... I accept that it maybe time to move on even though i dont want to. We were joint tenants so that complicated things even more with me trying to find council accommodation as we both had to end the tenancy agreement she now has to appeal to stay but im receiving no help to find anywhere fast im still in the spare bedroom. I dropped down to part time work 2weeks ago to try and spend more time and try and rekindle things but it backfired because it just seems all she wants is for me to pay all her bills pay for shopping etc while in return all i get is abuse off her. I have nowhere else to go. I don't know which way to turn
Hi there
...2 years is a long time to try and get your relationship back on track, I would say that you have done as much as you can do in the circumstances. Splitting up is always so hard, especially when children are involved. Do you have any family that can help out to start off with?
Are you able to go back to full time hours? It might be that you will have to rent privately, as a single man I don't think the council will be obliged to rehouse you, and if that's the case you will need to save for a deposit.
Do you think Relate might help, they could help with couple counselling but they are also very good at helping couples through the transition of break up. Here's a link
www.relate.org.uk
Best of luck
Hi There,
I agree with Mojo,
I think that trying for 2 years shows you have done all you can that with dropping to part time to be at home more and that back firing shows that actually as hard as it is it's time to call it a day, as Mojo has suggested relate may help, it may be too late to resolve the relationship and stay together but it may help with the seperation, it would give you both chance to be open with each other in a safe envioroment so you both know where you stand, and if that's something you would consider then I would talk to your partner and sell it as a way to seperate on nice terms rather than rebuild the relationship as it sounds as though she has decided it's over.
I don't think the council would home you as they work on a points system, the higher the points the more chance of getting somewhere, being a single bloke without children residing with you would score you very low unfortunetely, I think family would be your best option until you can raise enough for a depsosit.
I know how hard this must be for you as you don't want it to end and it's going to take a lot for that to sink in, but from my experience once things move in that direction and you get some space between the 2 of you things normally start to feel much better, you start to realise how bad things really were instead of burrying your head in the sand and just muddling through.
Things will get better.
GTTS