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Following on from my previous forum posts ( http://www.dad.info/forum/relationships/44377-newly-separated-depressed-dad-needing-help), I have my first mediation session with my ex-wife next Wednesday (Nov. 11th).
There's a lot of talk of "entitlement", and a good amount of guilt-tripping. The way I see it is that it can be a fairly straightforward an amicable process, but I'm getting a vibe from my ex-wife that she's going for blood.
Does anyone have any tips to get me through what could be quite an awkward and very new process for me?
The mediator will lead, they don't help with negotiations but they make sure you both get an opportunity to speak and listen to each other, as with most things, some mediators are better than others.
Try to remain calm, it can help you to stay on track if you have some proposals and points you would like to discuss already written down so that you can refer to them during the sessions.
If it becomes apparent the process is not going to work for you both, the mediator can discuss this with you and if necessary, sign any paperwork required for court.
Good luck and please let us know how you get on.
Hi There,
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As already said the mediator will normally ask you both what you are looking to achieve they will allow you both time to talk and go through things in detail, and then try and help you to reach an agreement.
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Having things written down as to what you want to achieve is a good idea, I would write more than you are actually looking for, without going to far, that way you can show compromise when you are challenged by your ex, which will be a big part of it.
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Hopefully you can get somewhere and avoid court.
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GTTS
Hi there
It might help to draft a copy of a parenting plan that you could introduce at the session. It might help to get discussions started and is recommended as part of the Child Arrangements Programme. You'll find a link to the CAFCASS parenting plan, with templates, in the stickys at the top of the legal eagle section.
Best of luck with it.
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