[Solved] Marriage break up

Afternoon everyone,

Ok day so far.
Been busy day, gone to the docs, just a good chat and got doc notes for work.
Also sorted out some counselling through my work, good old john Lewis

Whopps, half my post disappeared lol.
Anyway also sorted out video collection for next weds, and collect the rest of my stuff.
Feeling ok today.
Might take up golf, one thing the ex didn't want me to go.
Her previous b/f died after a golfing holiday...so she told me not to play...plus after my heart surgery...

Anyway might buy some cheap clubs..
Think that's it so far.
Cheers. Goatjazz

Good to hear you sounding more positive. Hope the sun is shining for you today and it's a better one!

Morning all,

Find the mornings the hardest part so far.
Just seems so empty, and this is when I think about contact the ex.....
But not going to do it!.
Still not looking forward to next weds, when I collect my last bits.
Then I have the holiday period, which again is going to be tough....knowing she is away, when I should be with her, in our favourite place. ...its going to suck.
...
Still I think I will try and work and take some holiday when I get the date go moving into flat.
Glad I have counselling booked, got first session on Monday.
Also doc notes to cover me at work if I am finding it tough.
....
Going to watch Olympic games today and try to chill. Go to car boot tomorrow, see if I can find any bargains.

Any advice or just anyone feel like chatting , feel free.
Thanks
Goatjazz

Hi,
Funny day so far, feel ok, just down and had a few wobbly moments, felt like sending off an email to the ex....but didn't do it!.
I know it won't do any good, just annoy her even more.
Just watching the golf on tv today.
Been to car boot this morning and brought an ironing board!.... And some wooden HOME ornaments...you know the letters that spell out HOME....thought that would be good for my flat when I move back in.
So just an ok day.... Just feeling a bit flat.... And I want to feel better....to be excited for tomorrow etc....but at the moment its just nothing.

Once I get back to my flat, I am going to start the dating again, join a site and get chatting, that will help pass some quiet times, and lets see what happens....new experiences, new people, and hey hopefully might meet some nice ladies.

Anyway again anyone that feels like a chat or any advice feel free to post on my thread.
Cheers
Goatjazz

Hi

Glad you have had a better day. It will take a while to get to some sort of normality, but good that you are starting to get some normality.

Morning.
Feeling ok, but just flat.
Not much in my life at the moment.
Just going to watch tv today.
Keep thinking of this holiday coming up that the ex is going on.
We both booked it, been to the same place four years in a row.
Keep getting reminders, you know silly things that just remind you of places.
Not sure what I can do to get rid of these thoughts and feelings.
Any help out chat welcome.
Goatjazz

Hi there

I can't believe how well you are doing to be honest....even though it doesn't feel that way to you! You're going to have times when it's difficult and the holiday coming up is one of those, not a lot you can do to alleviate that, except to keep busy, starting golf is a good idea....new interests to take your mind off it will definitely help.

I don't know about you but I'm enjoying watching the Olymics at the moment... I think we've got golf coming up, so something you should enjoy watching!

It's great that work are on board with you and are able to offer counselling...it will help I'm sure, they'll help you to explore your feelings and to adopt strategies to help you cope.

All the best

Thank you mojo,

Yes up and down days, even hours!.... Can feel ok one minute then booooom, it hits me again!.
Been sleeping better, and mornings are getting a bit better.
Off to Councilling tomorrow, so that should hopefully get my mind focusing on the right things.
Managed to watch the next episode of breaking bad this morning, something that I couldn't get myself to do....i was watching it the day before I got kicked out... So was avoiding it as it was a bad memory.... But I did it, was tough at first as had to remember which episodes I had watched, and then had to watch some bits again.... Silly but it was another step in the right direction.
Watching the golf now.
Still got to collect my last stuff on Wednesday, do will ask the counselling person what my best strategy should be. Will also ask about the holiday and find ways of coping.

Thanks again and any more advice is welcome
Goatjazz

morning mate

i no what your sating when you say your like feeling 1000% good but then next min your so low you start to think well this is [censored] i feel low , lonely , not wanted
iv been here trust me it will blow over then you will look at it in future and say aha why was like that .
your doing really well and the fact your letting us guys know how you feel is great becuase we can be here for you listen to whats going off and you can release your feeling instead of keeping them locked up .

when me and my ex split up its so hard to not think about them to want them to go see them i used to beat my self up thinking im going to go see her but then saying no what you doing .
i found that talking to over woman dating sites makes that feeling go away its wierd how it works how the male mind work but it helped me a lot i wasnt looking for a 1 night stand or just a bit of [censored] i would talk to them be flirting but i new that nothing was going to come of it.

go out do somthing golfing will take a lot of anger , stress out of you not saying you have these but it is a great way to get some fresh air enjoy and relax.

Gaz 🙂

Morning,
Thank you again for the replies.
Have had a good evening last night, watched the golf and had a pint of cider!.
Also got chatting to an old school friend on facebook, yes a lady!
Funny like lydamore says it does take your mind of other stuff.
So got a reunion/date/just going for a drink with her tomorrow!....
Sort of happened really quick, I said we should meet p sometime and then she replied- how about Tuesday!.... Sort of was not ready for that!.... Have told her all about my situation and said not ready for anything just yet.... But hey lets see what happens. Just go for a drink, but it's got my mind sort of taken off the ex.
Going to Councilling later, so that should help.
Anyway that's it for now.... Update later after counselling.
Cheers
Goatjazz

It's nice to have something to look forward to and good that you're aware you're not ready for anything right now. Might just do you the world of good to get out and talk to someone new. Good luck!