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Please forgive the humour - I realise this is usually a serious site with serious issues...
So picture me - I'm 49, average height, bit of a goatee and stubble, jeans and t-shirt (yep I've got one too). It might not be THE t-shirt, but at least it's a t-shirt. Do I qualify?
I'm stood by the refridgerators in Asda and things are getting to me. In front of me are tubs of "I can't believe it's not butter". Wow, butter must be a bad thing for you then. It's as good as butter but it's NOT butter. Whew!
I look over. Tubs of "utterly butterly"! Well what does that mean? Is it butterly as in it's actually butter or is it butterly as in its like butter? The confusion deepends when I realise it's made by Clover. Isn't clover butter? Well if Clover make Clover which is butter then why make something that's "Butterly". Clover are obviously trying to pull the wool - I need to start checking manufacturers and buying things not made by Clover. Their marketing strategy hasn't fooled ME! Ha!
Then I remember the slogan "You can't put a better bit of butter on your knife". I can't remember which product it was and I'm going to look darned stupid if I start asking people. Whatever it was, it's obviously the best butter, it says so. If I was a younger man I'd remember which product it was.
I've now been standing there for at least five minutes and the security guy monitoring the camera's is eyeing me up. Not in the relationship sense, thankfully, although it's been so long that tree's are beginning to look attractive. I need to make a decision! If I choose wrong, I could have heart disease or greasy skin or anything tomorrow. What to do, what to do?
Then there's a rather attractive looking lady who comes along and picks up some yoghurt. Do I ask? Will I look stupid. Will she feel sorry for me and beg me to marry her on the spot! I'm vulnerable, I'm confused, I need looking after! Then I remember the past 8 months. Forget it, I'll cope on my own.
If my ex had been with me she'd have told me exactly what to buy and how much to buy and how long it would last and if we could make cookies with it, or cake, or whatever. I put it to you that we need women in our lives, that without them we are nothing, that despite the nagging moaning whingeing whining complaining whimpering crying and begging, we are lost without hope.
I bet the statistics show that at least 90 percent of men with heart disease are divorced or separated!
I walked out without any spreads.
Lol,
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What a story, and when you said you were standing in a t-shirt in the fridge section you were going to say that you had hard nips Lol
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https://youtu.be/CDrqzne2WxY
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I haven't seen this ad in years, though can you trust men made out of butter telling you it's the best, maybe a trip to a M&S where the butter wouldn't be just butter, it would be a trip into a country field with daisy's and butter cups amounst freshly cut grass, where the butter is churmed by pixies Lol
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GTTS
Love the story and the telling. Yes, despite the fact that a lot on here are having problems with exs, when we move on, most of us wouldn't want to be alone for too long. Definitely feel much happier with the right woman in my life.
How old is that advert? It's amazing the things that stick in your head. In about 25 years time you'll be stood at a refrigerator in Asda thinking about me with hard nips - I can just imagine the poor pretty ladies face if I'd confronted her with hard nips and "butter or margarine?".
Now that you mention it, I'm just popping out for a while...
Oh dear.......
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That had me laughing away to myself at my desk, just as well I work on my own or people would have wondered what was going on.
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It is good to have some light hearted chat on here, we do help a lot of people with issues and that may be what the site is about, but it's good to have some fun posts too.
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In 25 years time no doubt butter and margerine will be outlawed due to the risk of health and be replaced with some sythetic long life spread that doesn't need to go in the fridge, would have loved to have seen the look on the ladies face though if you had turned to her holding butter with hard nips and asking her for help.
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GTTS