DAD.info
Forum - Ask questions. Get answers.
Welcome to the DAD.Info forum: Important Information – open to read:

Our forum aims to provide support and guidance where it can, however we may not always have the answer. The forum is not moderated 24 hours a day, so If you – or someone you know – are being harmed or in immediate danger of being harmed, call the police on 999.

Alternatively, if you are in crisis, please call Samaritans on 116 123.

If you are worried about you or someone you know is at risk of harm, please click here: How we can help

Dealing With A Poss...
 
Notifications
Clear all

[Solved] Dealing With A Possibly Dangerous Ex Girlfriend.

 
(@TwinCitiesVsMegalon)
Active Member Registered

First post here after lurking for a while. I guess I'll start with background info.

I'm originally from a small and very poor southern U.S. town. About the time I graduated from high school the population was about 500 people max. The town was pretty much a feeder for the sole local industry, a chemical plant.

So I had a high school sweetheart, went to junior and senior prom with her, and thought we were on track to get married. We dated for about four years, until I was almost done with my second year of college. She called my mom to tell her she didn't want to see me again, and basically left it in my moms lap to dump me. Now being regular church attendees my mom and her mom knew each other pretty well, so my mom got her mom on the phone. By the time I had gotten back from the forty five minutes one way drive to the community college I was attending, her mom had shoved her in their station wagon and driven over to my folks house with her. Her mom basically made her axe me face to face. The ex girlfriend admitted then and there that she'd gotten engaged to the local bank owners son, and that it was purely for financial reasons. She then had a verbal confrontation with her mom, who hadn't known about the engagement. I wasn't too coherent after that. I didn't date for a couple of years.

Now fast forward by twenty years. Like I said, the sole industry in the county I grew up in was a chemical plant, which was completely shut down in the early 2000s. The entire local economy collapsed. I really haven't been back there since, and am currently three states away in an area with a fairly vibrant economy. I managed to find a reasonable wife and have a litter. I'm not oil sheik rich, but I can afford a largish place, large enough that I had a granny cottage built for my mom after my dad passed away. This got her out of the hometown, which has really gone to [censored] due to the economy. It's also been pretty good since she gets to spend a lot of time with the kids.

This is where the problems with the ex start. Other than one night where we wound up at the Waffle House at the same time by pure luck, I have not had contact with this girl since she broke it off. Even then, I just looked at my brother, he knew the deal, and we paid up and left without saying a word to her. Recently though the wife got calls on her work number from a number she didn't recognize, but it had the hometowns area code. A 411 of the number and it was the ex, who the wife has had no previous contact with. She's left the wife voicemails about how she can 'see everything clearly now that she's off Suboxone' and she mentioned me in a Facebook rant with some photo's of her firing an assault rifle with her husband. This got back to me via a relative who is a county sheriff for the area, and didn't have a high opinion of the situation.

So the wife is starting up the process of getting a concealed carry permit, doubtless egged on by my mom's circle the wagons mentality. I'm not against that but I thought a restraining order might be in order. On the other hand, my brother thinks it's all blown out of proportion. Anyone else out there have to deal with something similar?

Quote
Topic starter Posted : 06/06/2018 11:44 pm
(@dadmod4)
Illustrious Member

Hi

This is a UK based site, so we have no experience with firearms threats or dealing with guns, but even without that, I can't think I've come across anything similar on here. You said the sheriff isn't pleased with the situation - I'd be tempted to ask his advice for the situation.

ReplyQuote
Posted : 07/06/2018 1:24 am
 Mojo
(@Mojo)
Illustrious Member Registered

Where threats of serious violence are concerned, whether firearms are involved or not, I would say that action of some sort is required... if something happened and you hadnt done anything,you would forever feel guilty.

As actd suggests, your relative/sheriff would be a good place to start, but certainly some form of injunction/restraining order is certainly worth thinking about too. It would certainly send a message to this ex to back off.

As its your wife that receiving calls, it might be worth her taking out some form of protective order, perhaps it could be done jointly, but im not at all familiar with US laws.

All the best

ReplyQuote
Posted : 07/06/2018 1:29 pm
(@TwinCitiesVsMegalon)
Active Member Registered

It's unfortunate that this is a U.K. based site for those of us in the U.S. as you don't see many sites that don't slant towards women.

The restraining order seems to be the first step, though.

ReplyQuote
Topic starter Posted : 07/06/2018 7:42 pm
 Mojo
(@Mojo)
Illustrious Member Registered

...It doesn’t stop us talking about things generally, we just can’t help with any legal/child support advice. Dads are Dads the world over and all share the same highs and lows!

All the best

ReplyQuote
Posted : 08/06/2018 1:50 pm
Share:

Pin It on Pinterest