[Solved] Christening

I think you should attend simply because I think you'll regret it if you don't, and ultimately, why be put off by someone whose opinion you wouldn't give two hoots about at any other time? It may also be that he's more used to dads causing a nuisance, than actually wanting to take an active part in their child's life, so you may have caught him off guard by actually caring.

He sounds an appalling vicar !!!

I would go and meet him with all the charm you can muster, be very cool, calm, collected and polite of course, win him over. Then in conversation when he is relaxed, ask him if he is aware of the terrible suffering single fathers go through trying to get contact with their children because of the atrocious behaviour of the mothers.

You could also ask him to do a Sunday sermon on the subject or ask him if he thinks it may be a good idea for you to write to the bishop to suggest it. I think at this point he might begin to squirm a little.

Me being me, I would do exactly that but I DO NOT THINK YOU SHOULD.

As for attending the christening that is for you to decide whether you can cope with the situation. I personally do not think a parent should choose a religion for a child. To my mind it is enforcing one's own beliefs on another which I don't believe we have a right to do. In my opinion it is for the child to make their own decision when they are old enough to understand.

If you have PR then you ex should discuss it with you and have your consent. I find that third parties in authority can be so difficult to deal with such as priests, doctors etc.

I would strongly advice that you attend with your friends and family if possible. My ex had my son christened without telling me and I made a point of it in court.

Thank you all for responding. I met with the vicar who did soften up face to face. I will attend but did make a point that we don't feel particularly welcomed by the ex and family which is quite daunting.

...I think it's a matter of best foot forward, is there any members of your family that might attend with you for moral support perhaps?

I'm sure things won't be as bad as you imagine, once you are there nobody will want to spoil the day with arguments and people are rarely as nasty face to face... If it were me I would go,out of my way to be friendly to the most unwelcoming of them, that always puts them on the back foot....plus it secretly amuses me that they will have no choice but to be pleasant back!

You are most probably right Mojo. It is nice to be nice. 😆 I don't like being false with others though and would want for my little one to make a choice in belief later on in life. I take it all with a pinch of salt and will be cool and calm on the day. I am hoping my close friend (chosen Godfather) will attend with his family which will certainly help.