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My son is 11 years old now and I’ve been separated from my ex for over 2 years. I see my son for a weekend every month (I live 200 miles away!!) so I’m always keen have him for longer during school holidays. During the summer I take him away on holiday for a week, but only in the UK. My son and I are really keen to have a week abroad in the sun, but my ex has insisted that she doesn’t want me taking him abroad. Her reason for this is that she says she’s has health issues and had an operation which prevents her from flying, so she couldn’t fly out to him if he had an accident. I’m not sure how true this is as she has always been known for slight exaggerations over her health. Although, if there was a problem abroad then the travel insurance would fly him back anyway!
I feel my son is missing out on so much by not seeing the world. His mother doesn’t take him away anywhere, or really do anything with him. It is only when he stays with me that he gets to go places and do activities. I don’t have any legal arrangements with my ex partner for access, and in the most part things are generally civil. We were never married, so I am constantly told I don’t actually have any rights over son at all regards what he does or where he goes. However, is there an age where my son can decide for himself what he wants to do? He’s desperate to go abroad, so at what point can he say he wants to go?
Thanks,
John
I'm sure your son has started voicing his opinions to his mum already, she's being very selfish not allowing him to go.
You can try writing her a letter outlining what you and your son would like to do and asking her to agree. Point out that he is old enough and he will be fully insured and looked after whilst he is away. You do have rights, if she won't agree you could try mediation. There is a charge for this unless you are on a low income or benefits, in which case you will be entitled to legal aid to cover the cost Here's a link to the mediation service and the legal aid calculator -
www.nfm.org.uk
www.gov.uk/check-legal-aid
If this fails then you can apply to the court for a Specific Issue Order, this will cost you £200 unless you are on a low income or benefits in which case you will be entitled to an exemption. You will need a C100 form to apply for this and form EX160a to check if you are exempt from the court fees.
Thanks for the quick response. I'll look to try and get some buy in from his mother about trip abroad. Would be useful if there was a legal age for his own consent I could quote in order to perhaps reinforce our argument.
I don't think there is one, except 16 when he can do pretty much what he wants.
Might be worth taking longer holidays in the UK, but starting to plan (with him) for that holiday when he is 16.