[Solved] Advice Needed

Hi there

Hopefully she won't use your child as a weapon, but if that happens you have a couple of options. The first is mediation, this is now a requirement before court action can be taken. It might be useful and with a neutral third party, on neutral ground, you could get your point across and hopefully reach agreement.

Although I agree that you shouldn't have to, sometimes it's easier to tell an ex what arrangements are in place and give reassurance....it's all about choosing your battles wisely.

It might be helpful to suggest working on a Parenting Plan, this might bring some clarity to your situation and help to lay some co parenting guidelines for the future. There's a sticky about Parenting plans with a template in the legal eagle section.

Best of luck

I agree, see if it calms down a bit, and then see if you can work things out amicably - will be best for all concerned if you can avoid mediators and court.

Hi There,
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I agree with the above, although it seems mad that she can do what she wants to but you get questioned, as Mojo has said you have to choose your battles.
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Maybe agree with her that if you stay at home then you don't need to make contact but that if you stay anywhere else you will, it may just stop things gettiing nasty.
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GTTS

As a parent and experienced much of what you have, I have to say it is your responsibility to inform the mother if you have him sleeping in a different location if she is the primary carer. You should also adopt the approach of offering your ex a chance to meet your new friend. Go for a coffee. She probably wont go but a least you can say you tried. Or even email information on you new partner.
Any mother will be concerned who you bring into his child life and will wont to feel comfortable who her is with.
Things will be hard at the start believe me, but once the child has built up a good relationship with your partner, and the mother can see that, it will put her mind a ease.

I have to disagree that it's the mothers right to be informed every time the child stays somewhere she, I'm pretty sure the mother doesn't feel she has to inform you every time she stays over somewhere else with the child.

I think it's a method of control, her nose is out of joint because you are seeing someone else. As you have PR your time with your child is yours to do as you wish, that includes introducing him to others and staying over at different places....being spontaneous is allowed in my opinion.

That said, you could agree to share information with her if it's something pre planned, but it shouldn't stop you from doing fun stuff with your boy on the spur of the moment.

Trying to keep it amicable is always a good idea, so try and rise above it all, but if it gets too much you could suggest mediation, or working on the parenting plan that I mentionedpreviously.

All the best