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I really want a second child. I've always wanted 2 kids...
My wife doesn't seem to be able to make her mind up. One minute she does, the next she doesn't...
Has anyone else had this sort of issue? How did you approach it?
I really don't want to come across as being too pushy but I also don't want to be the one to compromise
on this one.
difficult one bud... have you been able to discuss the reasons she doesn't want another one? are they things you can overcome? I suppose ultimately parenting is a partnership and so you need to bear with one another, but if you can work out the worries / fears etc she has you might be able to work thought it?
Ron
I saw your post the other day but found it hard to respond quickly.
From my experience I think it is natural to have lots of uncertainties when making any big change. And there must be hundreds of possible reasons to be anxious about having extra children.
eg. Something my wife explained to me a few years after our middle boy as born: she was really worried that if she had a second child she couldn't imagine having to share her love with another baby and didn't think she could. Anyway, all was fine after the birth. And she quickly realised she was able to love a second child as much as her first - even commenting that in hindsight and from the outside it seems a bit silly afterwards.
Values and priorities are definitely good to mull over in a relationship - so perhaps chatting about other values and priorities might help to clarify what helps and what might hinder our hopes and dreams. Perhaps this might help to put perspective on any concerns you each might have around a larger family (eg income, number of bedrooms, the physical strength to cope, etc). I don't do this girlie listening/supporting thing very well at all. This isn't something to solve (which is what I usually unintentionally try to do when 'listening' to my wife).
Most of all I think every Mum out there would benefit from regularly hearing how proud their hubby is of them. And how much you think they are a really great Mum, wife and friend.
Do post again. It would be really good to be able to support you as you work this out together.
/Orange
I'd like to thank both of you for the comments you've made. It's nice to see what other people think. I found you points of view really helpful.
Thanks
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