Welcome to the DAD.Info forum: We are not open to new posts at this time
Our forum aims to provide support and guidance where it can, however we may not always have the answer. The forum is not moderated 24 hours a day, so If you – or someone you know – are being harmed or in immediate danger of being harmed, call the police on 999.
Alternatively, if you are in crisis, please call Samaritans on 116 123.
If you are worried about you or someone you know is at risk of harm, please click here: How we can help
I just read the DadTalk article on The Cult of Fatherhood and went to the full artilcle online.
The thing I most identified with was where it said:
The lack of a good role model leaves the modern dad having to invent his own job description. Martina Klett-Davies, research fellow at the Family and Parenting Institute, outlines this confusion: “In the past, what it meant to be a man was quite clear – you followed your father into a profession or manual job and your future was more carved out. But now you have to muddle through. ..."
It has literally taken me years to work out how to 'do' being a Dad. And I've worked out that I have to keep adjusting how I "muddle through". From time to time this constant 'adjusting' is very exhausting - but on the other hand rewarding when you get a brief sense of that seemed to work well 😎 )
Did anything jump out at you from reading the article ❓
I've muddled through from birth to present - my oldest is about to hit 21. It always has the feeling that I'm 'playing at being a dad' but somehow my kids have turned out exactly as I'd wish for. I can't say that I spent lots of time being with them (in fact, I spent a fair bit of time avoiding my ex when I was married to her, and the kids were sometimes with her during those times), but they have always known that I'll listen to them, and if I promise to do something with them, then I stick to my promises. Never read any books about being a father, and can't say that I took any advice either way - I just did what felt right and it seems, in hindsight, that mostly it probably was.
- Samaritans – call 116 123
- Shout – text the word ‘Shout’ to 85258
