[Solved] Complaints about Divorce and Family Law

It’s scandalous and now Judges and courts insisting on mediation which are now charging extortionate prices. We have just had assessment and two joint session’s £900 absolutely ridicules and no further forward with agreement. How can they justify charging these amounts makes my blood boil

The issue with mediation is they actually have no teeth and as such, I feel, they are a waste of time and I think that my ex-wife likes using them as she doesn't have to pay and I am the one spending out all the time and nothing ever gets resolved. The courts I also feel are so geared to the women and as someone who has to pay again (she gets legal aid) she likes going to court, so I just end up skint and no further along with anything with regards to my child.

Ah but come April, Legal Aid for Family Law is to be stopped and only cases where there is proven domestic abuse will receive state funded assistance.

They are pushing for even more mediation and there may be extra funding for this, I'll try and get more information on this. 🙂

Watch the DV cases rise and I have heard that courts want to see if people can be helped by doing an assesment meeting after the first direction in the court building but after that its pay pay pay , there should be a cap on how much they can charge. we got sent to the one we are using wish I had stuck to the one i arranged for £60 an hour not £90 . Why should poor Dads/Nannies pay all this money just to see there own children, this money would be better spent on their children. will be over a thousand pounds for 5 hours work, £200 an hour its more then I get in a [censored] week for 35 hours. Can only see it getting worse as cafcass push for it , GGGGRRRRR

..I'm hoping that when they say that DV must be proven beyond doubt, and an accusation of DV without anything to back it up will not be counted, will actually work ak...but I've got to agree with you about the charges, my gut feeling is it will be a big issue. I'm going to try and find out if there will be broader funding planned to accomodate the big push towards Mediation

This is a really interesting conversation guys loving it.

I made a visit to a contact centre yesterday, which is run by a couple of female ex-social workers - it's a run as a social enterprise (so not for profit) and was absolutely brilliant place but that's another story.

We were talking about separation and they shared the view that mediation doesn't always work because in their experience, one person ends up agreeing to compromise whilst the other just sticks to their guns. So one person leaves feeling vindicated and the other feeling slightly cheated (if not a lot cheated).

Maybe it's time to rethink the whole separation issue - how could the system be less confrontational? I am not sure I would even know where to start, at the moment it does seem like the only real winners are the solicitors.

Gooner

I'm hoping that when they say that DV must be proven beyond doubt, and an accusation of DV without anything to back it up will not be counted

I think you'll find that DV won't have to be proved. the common consesus is that all men are potential perpetrators. ;;)

the common consensus is that all men are potential perpetrators

That's a bleak view BF. Do you really think that is the case?

yes i do.

I think the exception proves the rule in this case. could you imagine the outcry if all claims of dv had to be proved, also, in some cases, it would be impossible to prove. accusations would be made of not protecting the victim etc i have been told that dv has now been extended to include verbal abuse as well now.

I think Family Law in this country is still morphing! Up until 1973 authority over a child lay with the father alone, and it was not until after this Act that mothers had authority over children that they could exercise independently. This just went from one extreme to the other and in my opinion is the cause of all the problems to date. There has to be a middle way and recognition that family life is now so diverse that simple rules cannot apply...one size cannot fit all in modern society.

I think children should be taken right out of the divorce process, and custody and contact shouldnt be decided as part of a divorce settlement or by a judge in court. Perhaps an independent body needs to be set up and the introduction of family centres that cater specifically for the needs of children alone after seperation and divorce, a place where families in opposition would have to attend and be given guidance and counselling to help with the process and taught that their differences should not be visited on their children. The whole process needs to be more inclusive, where its not about the rights of the parents but more about the rights of the children.

I think education is key and parenting should be covered at school, the changes that are needed are changes in attitude and whilst its all geared to the mother, even down to the huge imbalance in maternity leave, the unfairness will continue...there needs to be a level playing field....goodness we've got a long way to go! I'll get down from my soapbox now! :}

Don't let us hold you back NJ.

feel free to jump up on your soapbox whenever you want.

Gooner